You have me
by give-me-tvd
Summary: Collection of Steroline drabbles that I post on Tumblr.
1. Chapter 1

She got out from her bathroom in a towel, the end of her hair playing on her shoulder, drops of water slipping on her neck. She looked tired and pale, and got a step back when she saw him sitting at the edge of her bed.

"You feel better?" he looked at her with a light smile. She nodded slowly as she held the towel tighter from the top and sat at the other edge of the bed.

He looked at her hand and remembered how she held his shoulder tightly, _it was dark and cold. The witches hurt her so much that she couldn't heal fast. Blood was all over her body. When he got in to the place, Enzo killed the witch and broke the spell. Stefan ran to Caroline at the ground._

 _He pushed the hair away from her face. She opened her eyes slowly, and by the time she saw him, the tears fell down her face, she reached her hands to hold her face, they were shaken and cold. "Stefan…" she said as her breath shook, "You are here… you are here." She sighed throw the tears, struggled to catch her breath._

 _He held her hand on his face and whispered, "I'm here."_

 _"Don't leave me again… don't…" she squeezed her eyes shut from the pain. And hold him from his shoulders, trying to hug him. He pulled her up a little and put his hands on the back of her neck to hold her; he put his head on her hair and whispered, "Shhhh, I'm here. I'm not leaving. I'm here." He felt her fingers holding him stronger; she hugged him so tight, she was afraid to lose him again._

 _They stayed like that for minutes, Enzo waited for them outside. Stefan felt her breath getting normal, she lost her grip of him and her arms fell slowly. He pulled back and found that she was sleeping; at least she wasn't in pain. He held her with his arms and got her to the house they stayed in after they left Mystic Falls._

"Look, Stefan… If you are planning to leave again, you better tell me now." She said as she closed her eyes. His mind was back to her, sitting with him.

"Caroline…" he said and she interrupted him, "No, Stefan. You listen to me. Because if you are planning to leave again, you have to tell me; you can't just go without telling me again." She said as she stood and raised her finger against him, and the other hand still holding the towel from the top.

He was in front of her in a second, his hands holding her shoulders, "Hey, I'm not leaving. Okay?" he nodded his head, like he was relaxing her. She sighed as she nodded with him.

"I'm not leaving; not after what happened today. Just the thought that they could've hurt you… I can't lose more people." He said as he put his hands on her face.

"We'll bring them back… together." she said calmly. He smiled at her and pulled his hands slowly and walked to the door.

"You know, it's good that you weren't planning to leave; because I wouldn't let you go." She whispered without turning around. He smiled happily at her words and left the room.

For the first time in a long time she was happy. Things were still bad, but at least she has him to help her and hold her tight, to whisper at the end of the night, "You have me."


	2. I need you to trust me AU

They get through the door all groggy and drunk. Her arm over his neck; he was supposed to be the one that she leans on. But, they ended up stumbling and laughing at how each one of them can't help the other to walk.

They open the door and they hardly succeeded not to fall on the ground. Her mom isn't home as the sheriff has to be late, always and always. The lights are all off and she tries hopelessly to reach the plug. She claps happily when she successes to turn the lights on.

"Okay, okay. We get it; you know how to turn the lights on." He says as he shrugs his arm off.

"Hey, I need some credits." She giggles happily. He nods with a smile and lean on the door, "Well I hope you know the way to your room because I should go home now." He says with a smile.

"What? NO." She almost yells, "I don't want to sleep." She says slowly as she leans down to grab the keys from the ground.

He watches her and he can't help it but smile.

They know each other for three years now, he thinks. They've been through a lot. And they have been always there for each other. She was there for him when Elena left him for his brother. He never forgets the fact that she chose his side and made it clear that she wasn't okay with Elena's choice.

And he was there when her Tyler left her, and when her father died, he was the one that stayed with her for days, sleeping on the couch. Just so he can be with her when she wakes up from one of those nightmares.

"HELLO, earth to Stefan." She waves her hand in front his eyes and she got him out of his thoughts. "You really hate dancing, don't you? We didn't even dance that much." She scoffs.

"We've been dancing for the whole night." He raises his eyebrows in disbelief.

"Must be so exhausting for the Salvatore who doesn't dance." She narrows her eyes at him, "How comes that you hate dancing while Damon, your brother, didn't stop dancing for a second." She teases him as she titles her head.

"Hey! So that's what I get after dancing for hours with you. I mean I could've just sat in there and watched you sitting alone with no one dancing with you." He smirks at her.

"Well, as my friend you wouldn't just leave me there." She says as she takes a step closer to him. She stumbles quickly and falls in his arms. She giggles happily with her eyes closed.

He sighs as he puts her in his arms, and carries her in the bridal way. "Looks like you need help to get to your room." He says calmly with a smile across his lips.

She buries her face in his shoulder and holds his collar tight. "My hero." She whispers to his chest. He can't help it but feel a twist in his stomach, something he always feels in these moments, when she tells him something epic without realizing it.

He puts her in bed. He takes her boots off while she covers her face with her arm, helps her to get covered and sit beside her as he pushes her hair away.

"I hate him." She whispers with her eyes closed. "Who?" He asks simply as he furrows.

"Ty, Tyler." She sighs. And he gets little confused; Caroline and Tyler broke up six months ago, why would she bring it up now.

"Because he left you?" He asks slowly, trying not to go so far with that as he knows that she doesn't like to think about it.

"No, I mean of course I'm mad because he left me. I will never forget how he left me, saying I wasn't enough." She takes a breath as she opens her eyes and continues, "But the thing is, I hate how he makes me feel. Even thou we aren't together any more, I feel bad just by looking at him." She pauses and shakes her head as she tries to find the words in her drunken mind, "It's just… when I see him, I remember those words he said, that I wasn't enough for him. And then I think, what if I will never be enough? What if I won't be someone's first choice? I mean… I'm never the one."

"Caroline…" he whispers but she continues anyway, "I mean sometimes when I give myself to the thought, I hate myself. And then I can't imagine that anyone would love me." She says as her voice gets shaken, and the tears start to form in her eyes. "What if no one loved me, Stefan… what if I'm never the one? I can't continue my life alone. I don't want to end up alone."

"But I do love you."

It comes out just that simple; he doesn't realize that he said it till it was out. She opens her mouth in confuse, she searches his face for any sign of joking. But she realize that he's serious, with those eyes looking deep in hers, and his lips almost smiling, his features looks sad and happy at the same time. And that smile in his face looks afraid.

"I do, Caroline." He sighs as he lets a little laugh to escape his lips, "I don't even know when it happened. It's just; you were always there for me. You never left me. Even when Elena and I broke up, you were at my side and you didn't care about anything else."

She shakes her head and her eyes blink several times because of surprise. He smiles at her reaction.

"You're drunk." She says hardly as she looks away. And he shakes his head nervously, "No, no Caroline. I'm not."

She doesn't let him continue, "Yes you are, Stefan; It's not like you just realize it." She says still not looking at him.

"Don't do that, Caroline." He whispers as he flexes her chain so she looks at him, "Don't run from it. Don't run from me. I'm not that type who says that he loves you just because he's drunk and you know it." He pause a bit as he thinks of something, "Unless you don't have the same feelings for me." He furrows his eyebrows as the fact that she might not love him beck hits him. He can't help it but his hands get shaken and cold.

She reaches her hand to his face and rubs his cheek. "You are the one who said we never gonna happen."

He titled his head and closed his eyes as he felt guilty. He never thought about these words. And the fact that she remembers those means that it hurt her more than it should have.

"That was a long time ago, Caroline. Many things had changed." He says in a whisper and she pulls her hand from him, "It's true; many things had changed. I got to realize that real love existed only in fairy tales. And what we have is only a mess that gets to break our hearts." She puts a little smile on her lips and continues, "And I've already got broken many times. I can't do it anymore."

"But, Caroline. You just said that you don't want to end up alone." He says and she looks away as she pulls her hand to her hair. But, he grabs it before she can take it away.

"I know that you've been through a lot. And I know that you're afraid of being hurt again. But, that's how life works; you risk yourself so you can explore what you want." He squeezes her hand and continues, "I need you to trust me Caroline."

She takes a deep breath with her eyes closed. She moves from where she's lying to the middle of the bed, then she pat on the empty side without looking at him.

A shaken smile get in his lips as he gets under the cover, she puts her head on his chest and lays her hands next to her face. One of his hands holds her elbow tightly and the other rubs with her hair.

"I'm gonna trust you." She whispers to his chest, and he barley hears it. And all what he does is to hold her tighter and kiss her head as they lay in there.


	3. Can't hold it back

Caroline stood next to the table, a glass of bourbon hanging from her hand. Her eyes following Stefan and the girl in his hand as they moved with music.

Caroline used to enjoy parties, enjoyed walking in her dress like a princess. But, here she was in the Lockwood mansion, looking stunning in her black dress as her hair plays softly on her shoulders, Surrounded by people dancing and laughing. She can see her friends walking around, Elena and Damon dancing, Bonnie and Jeremy laughing as they lean by the wall, even Tyler had a date.

Last time she saw him was a few minutes ago when he took the girl up stairs. But yet, nothing really mattered as the scene of Stefan, dancing with this girl who came out from the middle of nowhere telling stories about how they met back when Stefan left them.

Just the scene of them dancing made Caroline's stomach twist; watching them swaying with the music, her hands on his shoulder, his hands around her waist. She couldn't help it but drain another glass of bourbon as she turned around and gave them her back.

"Are you okay?" Matt asked calmly as he stood next to her. She turned to him in shot as she felt uncomfortable with him being there in the middle of her thoughts, bitter thoughts. "You know? Bonnie asked me the same thing. I don't get it! I'm fine."She replied as she rolled her eyes, her voice almost normal as she tried not to look drunk.

"Well, you're sitting alone, and drinking a lot." He said as he motioned to the glass of bourbon.

"I'm doing well." She gave him a nod with a small smile, "I just don't want to interrupt the couples' reunion." She said as she pointed with her hand exactly where Stefan and the girl were dancing, without turning around. "Is this because of Tyler?" Matt asked as he titled his head.

"No, no it's totally okay. I mean I was impressed by how fast he is. But, I don't really care." She waved her hand at him as she really didn't think about it; she was busy with watching her best friend instead of her ex boyfriend.

"Hey." Stefan's voice knocked her from the back. She didn't turn around; instead she squeezed her eyes shot as she held the glass tighter, biting her lips. Stefan being around her wasn't a good idea, not right now. He was dancing with a girl that he never mentioned and she was drunk enough to spell the wrong words.

Matt and Stefan shared a look both furrowing their eyebrows as she didn't move or talk.

"Okaaay! I'll go to see Jer." Matt said as he pated Stefan's shoulder and left. Stefan walked closer to the table as he leaned his elbow on it. "Are you okay?" he asked as he tried to reach her eyes.

"I'm fine. Why everyone is asking me this?" she almost shouted as she rolled her eyes, looking at the glass in her hands.

He didn't reply. He just looked down at her, challenging her to look at him, if she can really lie when she's looking to him in the eye. And somehow, she understands what he's doing, and no she isn't going to look at him. It's already difficult to lie when she's just next to him. And damn it if he can read her without even trying.

They remain in silent for seconds, and she can't stand him looking at her in this way. She needs to say something; she needs to turn the roles. She needs to say something.

"I was right you know." She says in whisper, still not looking at him and focusing on her glass. He only furrows, waiting for her to continue and she did, "I told you will move on, and here you are, all moved on." She almost scoffed as she laughed under her breath, trying not to look dramatic.

He didn't say anything. She did it, she made him speechless. Many words were on his mind. But, none of them would be helping. For a second in there he didn't understand her. Thou he did, he knew where this was coming from. But, he didn't really believe it. She isn't jealous, is she? He thinks. But everything he sees makes him feel so.

Because while Caroline was looking at them dancing, her eyes wasn't at the right place, and maybe because she was so drunk she couldn't notice him looking at her, not even from the corner of his eyes. He was completely staring at her, wondering where her mind was while she was looking at his hands around the girl's waist.

And her she was, standing next to him, her hands holding each other nervously, her eyes avoiding him. She stops her lips immediately from trembling by biting her lower lip as she shakes her foot suddenly in nervous; because now, she can't hold it together.

"You fell madly in love." She finally looks up at him and she hates it, how her voice gets shaken in the end, how suddenly she can't feel her knees, how the tears forming in her eyes make it difficult for her to see him.

Stefan opened his mouth to reply. But, there were no words out. Right in this moment, all the memories came in a rush; he remembered her words at the prom, how they gazed at each other while they were dancing. He remembered the many times she has been on his side, defending him, how she was always looking at him with admire in her eyes. He even remembered Lexi's words and it all shock him that he froze for a minute.

"I'm sorry, I think I got drunk." She says quickly as she breaks the eye contact with him, right before he could see full through her. She leaves the glass and turn around to walk, "I should leave." She says as she looks at the ground, moving away from him.

She succeeds to get out of the mansion as she vamps run. But, he's already holding her wrist. She stops in her place without turning around.

"Caroline." He whispers softly and she closes her eyes, feeling that she had just been exposed. Her feelings came to the surface and in this moment there was no coming back. She imagined what would happen next. In a second she saw him refusing her, she saw herself crying alone at the corner of her room. Thank god that he didn't give her a chance to continue with her thoughts as he grabbed her wrist tighter and made her turn at him.

"Caroline." He says again, and this time it makes her heart ache. The way her name slips out of his lips. She heard him saying it many times. But now, it was different. She is facing him. But, her eyes are closed, her chest is shaking. Her eyelash getting wet as the tears threaten to fall.

"Hey." His voice is still a whisper as he cups her face with his hand. He rubs her cheek as he gets ready to the tears that start falling just by his touch.

"I-I just… I can't." She shakes her head as the tears stream faster from her closed eyes.

He moves her hands down to her shoulder; he rubs them slowly then continues his way to her hands. He squeezes them as he whispers, "It's okay. It's okay."

"No. it's not." She says as she keeps shaking her head, "You moved on. You… you moved on. And I know that it makes no sense; I should be happy for you, you're my best friend." She pauses as she sobs nervously.

"Caroline, talk to me." He says as he gets closer to her. He knows what he wants to hear. He just realized everything and he wanted to hear it from her; just to make sure he wasn't hallucinating.

She takes a deep breath and she stops shaking only for a second, "You left, Stefan. No words. You just left. And I waited and waited." The words were coming out faster and faster, it was difficult to understand what she was saying. But, he managed to.

"And I know that it's stupid, thinking that we were something. But I couldn't help it. I just- and then you come up with- and she is not even- I mean she is not your type and you know each other for what? Three months?" the words don't make sense, she is talking fast, not completing he sentences. But, among all of her words, it's only one thing that matters to him.

"You thought we were something?" he asks in a whisper as his eyebrows get furrowed. She widened her eyes at the ground and pulled her hands from his grip to her forehead. She closed her eyes and tried to breath. She inhale slowly and talks in a weak tone, "I'm being stupid." She says and a tear slips on her cheek.

He wiped the tear away and looked at her instantly. "Yes you are." He says and she purses her lips to stop the sob that's coming.

"You're stupid because you've been hiding it all this time." He continues as his eyebrows hiked, "And I've been more stupid because I never noticed." His lips curved in a smile at her reaction; her eyes opened in surprise and her lips trying to find a word. She can't do anything but sigh.

suddenly he pulled her to his chest, he pulled her quickly and strongly that it hit his chest. He didn't even think about it, he just felt it was right. He wrapped his hands around her and smelled her scent in. she didn't stop crying, actually she cried harder and as usual he understands her, he knows what she was going through so he hugged her tighter and rubbed her shoulder.

For the last months, he'd been completely stupid, blind. The things that were okay for him became more by now. Every touch, every word and every smile means a lot of things now as he holds her in his arms. It's funny how a few days ago he saw nothing but his best friend and now, he feels her as a completely new person but somehow, a person he knows for a long time.


	4. Goodbye is never easy

_It's almost dawn when Caroline found Stefan with his bags in the hallway. She was in her pajamas and rubbing her sleepy eyes, which got widen as soon as she spotted the bags in his hands._

Her eyes watered suddenly as she shook her head nervously. He looked at the ground without a word.

She walked closer to him, her knees trembling together. She could swear that she didn't feel her knees at that moment; actually she felt nothing but her heartbeats going faster.

"I'm sorry." She said in a whisper, "I'm sorry, it's all my fault." She lifted her hand to her chest, as she was trying to keep her heart its place.

"Whatever I've done, I'll fix it." Her voice cracked in between, "I'll change." She said, sounding so broken.

"Stop… Just stop." He said shaking his head slowly, finally his eyes looking at her. Her eyes were Desperate, asking million of questions.

"It's not your fault, none of it." He licked his lips slowly, "It's me; I can't do this anymore." His voice is barely above a whisper. He didn't want this to happen, that's why he was intending to leave while she was sleeping.

Her features went numb for a moment, "Is this because of what Lexi said?" she asked as she remembered their conversation about it the other night when he was drunk, it's true he couldn't remember most of the conversation when he woke up. However, she knew that he meant everything he said including "I'm afraid of the "us" word."

He shook his head and opened his mouth to talk but she didn't let him, "Because if it's, we can fix it. We'll just forget about it. We can do this." She said and her voice got lower at the last part; somehow the words felt so difficult to come out as she hated her voice in that moment.

"I'll fix it, I'll change." She said as she lifted her hand to his face, cupping it with her shaken fingers.

He closed his eyes as he held her wrists by both of his hands, "Caroline, it's not your fault." He said slowly, separating the words from each other.

"I'll go with you." She said as she swallowed nervously. She looked to him in the eye, "take me with you. Just don't leave me." She shook her head and he finally opened his eyes after another deep breath. "I'm sorry, Caroline; I can't." He said in a whisper and she squeezed her eyes shot.

"This version of me, it'll hurt you. And I don't want to hurt you." He said with closed eyes, feeling guilty for those words; he knew that she was in pain and so he was.

"It's not fair." She said, closing her eyes too.

"I know." He said and lean down to her forehead, his eyes back to closed and his eyebrows furrowing. He paused in the middle but eventually he cut the space between his lips and her forehead. He replaced a soft kiss on there and his eyebrows furrowed even more that his forehead crimped. They stayed like this for a moment, his lips feeling her softness.

A tear fell down her cheek as she felt him against her, her hands got cold and shaky on his cheek. And by then he realized he must let go.

He separated from her and opened his eyes slowly. He looked down at her. They were only few inches apart. Her eyes still closed, more tears streaming down her cheek.

He held her hands tighter as they were still cupping his face. For some reason he didn't want to let her go, he wanted to hug her and wipe her tears away. But, instead he pushed her hands away slowly and held his bag once more.

"Goodbye, Caroline." He said quickly, turning his face to stone, trying not to look hurt for leaving her.

She didn't look around at him leaving. Her hands were still in the position they were, like she was still holding his face.

Just when he closed the door behind him, she felt like someone put a stake through her heart. She ran to the door and opened it in a rush.

"Stefan." She said and fell to the ground immediately when she didn't find him. She put her hands on her lap and cried intensely. Because for one more time, he was gone. And he wasn't the first one who left her behind. But somehow it hurt more than any other time.


	5. For you

_When life leaves you high and dry_

 _I'll be at your door tonight_

 _If you need help… if you need help_

Caroline ran to Stefan where he was thrown at the floor. She got her hands on his shoulders and helped him to sit straight.

"What are you doing?" she yelled at Damon who stood in front of them, his gaze not leaving Stefan, while Stefan looked away.

"It's not his fault; Elena made her decision and none of us would change it. It's not his fault." Caroline said, angry.

"If you didn't give up… none of this would happen." Damon said in a low voice but still angry. "You shouldn't give up, not you." He said, then he walked pass them and left.

They both stayed in silence, no one moved. His eyes didn't leave the floor and her eyes didn't leave his face. He was guilty, and somehow, she was happy with it. Of course she felt bad for him fighting with Damon, but seeing him like that, the fact that he felt guilty, that he cared again. It was good, she missed it.

He finally looked at her after what seemed like eternity for her. They just stared at each other for a moment before she pulled her hands from his shoulder and rested them on her lap.

His eyes drifted to her lips as she licked them slowly. She was now looking at her hands and avoiding his gaze.

"And you? Don't you want to punch me in the face?" he said with a little laugh.

"Believe me, if that what it would take, I would do it." she said with a nod, looking up at him with her eyes travelling his face.

He nodded too, and then he just shook his head. "Then what would it take?" he asked. She sighed heavily as she looked away.

"Tell me, if a punch in the face can't help it, then what else can I do?" he shifted his position, his body facing her as they both sit on the floor.

"What, now you care to fix things with me? Four months ago you completely avoided me and now you're all in to make up with me?" she asked, her eyebrows furrowed.

"Caroline, I didn't avoid you. Everything was just a mess, I was a mess… and I needed to be alone." His eyes were so concerned; he wanted her to believe him.

"And now what? Your brother is back and you want me back too? You suddenly don't want to be alone?" she said angrily as she stood up on her feet. Then he stood too.

"Yes, Caroline. I don't want to be alone." It was almost a shout, but then he took a breath and calmed down. "I know it's selfish, but I don't, I don't want to be alone. I need you with me, to fix the whole mess with Damon and Elena and Enzo and Tripp and Mystic falls and Bonnie." He was talking quickly that he almost caught his breath.

"I need you Caroline." He sighed and dropped his arms in surrender.

"And I was always there." She whispered, shaking her head. "You're the one who left, you didn't let me be there for you."

"And now I'm here Caroline. I'm late, but I'm here. Don't let your anger drive us away again. I'm here… and I need you." He held her hand with both of his hands.

 _Give me reasons to believe_

 _That you would do the same for me_

 _And I would do it for you_

She looked down at their hands, she swallowed tightly. She was breathing difficultly, hard.

"You want us to be friends again." Her voice was throaty. It was more a fact than a question, and she wasn't saying it to him, she was sending it to her mind.

"Yes." He said, "It's all I want."

She looked up at him, took a deep breath and bit her lower lip. Then there was a smile, getting bigger. And the pain in it growing, it was sad and broking. She nodded to him, nervously. And a tear fell down her cheek.

He sighed in relief, and pulled her to his arms. He hugged her tight. She didn't respond, she just let him hug her. They were both closing their eyes. He was smiling, a big and happy smile, everything was getting better again.

And she was crying, silently. There was a smile, but it was heartbreaking, it was sad and pity. Everything was getting worse; she just signed the papers of forgiving him, of being his friend _again_. She knew it would be difficult. But he needed her, and she just couldn't walk away from him and leave him like that, lost.

And because after everything he put her through, after he walked away from her for million times, she _couldn't_ walk away from him, she couldn't change the fact that she _loved_ him. With everything he was, with him walking away and being gone, she _loved_ him.

 _'cause baby I'm not moving on_

 _I love you long after you're gone gone gone._


	6. I'll make you unbreakable

_When you lose your way and the fight is gone_

 _Your heart starts to break and you need someone around now_

 _Just close your eyes for a while_

 _I'll put my arms above you and make you unbreakable_

It was a late hour, and it was already raining. It's when Stefan decided he should take some rest, and then he would continue looking for Caroline. Or maybe he thought he would find her in that dinner, after all, she always ended up there, that's what Alaric had said.

He walked in, hands in his pocket, his eyes scanning the place for her, but she wasn't there.

He tried not to look so disappointed. He sat down, and then the waitress made her way to him. "Mr. Stefan, your friend left you this." She said with a smile then walked away.

Stefan pulled his hands quickly out of his pocket; he opened the letter and started reading it quickly. So she was here, he was so close. After three days of looking for her, this might be the closest he had got to her.

 _Dear Stefan,_

 _Dear, such a lame word, huh? I'm trying to find a way to write this down, but I can't. I guess I'll just say it all, it's not like I'll regret it._

 _It's hard Stefan, everything is just not the same anymore; first I lost my home, then Bonnie, then you, and now mom. I guess I never saw it before, but she was the only thing keeping me going. Whenever I fell down, I had to get up for her. She was always there for me. And now she is just gone, forever._

 _I thought I can be strong, I thought that I'll move on, find a way to continue my life; I always did, when I lost my dad, or Tyler, even you._

 _But it turns out that I never really did, I kept hiding it, pretended that it's nothing, I kept ignoring the pain. That it's just exploded._

 _For the last two days, I had thought of turning it off for million times, I was so close, but whenever I close my eyes, and try to turn the switch, I see you. I see you disappointed, I see you trying to gather the broken pieces. And I don't want that._

 _I refuse to change, I refuse to lose myself. But I'm scared that one day I'll stop fighting and just turn it off. So if I'm going to die, I want to die as me, as Caroline Forbes, the one who didn't change._

 _By the moment you're reading this, I'll be inside Mystic Falls, along with my mom._

 _I'm sorry Stefan, I'm sorry for ruining our friendship, I'm sorry that I ever felt something for you. And please, don't feel sad for me or because of me, there will be no more pain. And at last, I want you to do me a favor, whenever you think of me; I want you to remember Caroline Forbes, your best friend, your sponsor sober coach, not the Caroline who had feelings for you behind the scenes._

 _I'm sorry Stefan, Goodbye._

He was frozen in his place, his head trying to understand what that was. However, he managed to get up and walk out of the door. He wanted to ask the girl when Caroline left this message. But it didn't matter; all what mattered was getting to her quickly.

He finally was back to himself, he found himself already outside, and he couldn't tell how he walked out.

"Caroline." He whispered as he finally took over himself again, then he was running with vamp speed to the borders.

 _She stands in the rain just to hide it all_

 _If you ever turn around, I won't let you fall down_

 _I swear I'll find your smile_

 _I'll put my arms above you and make you unbreakable_

She was standing in front of the borders, the rain has already ruined her hair and clothes. Her eyes were clearly dried of tears. She looked at this town, her home. Her memories are there, her mom is there.

She convinced herself it was the right thing. She has seen how being emotionless went with Elena and Stefan. She could see herself killing people and losing herself, she could see her friends scared because they can't recognize her anymore, she could see Stefan disappointed. She would be much happier if they remember her as the same Caroline she always used to be.

She looked back at the road. No one was there. _He won't come_ , she thought.

She smiled a broken smile before she looked back to the borders; she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Then she took the one only step separating from her end, her mom, the pain would end, she would be fine.

She opened her eyes suddenly, she reached her hand to her through, she tried to breath, to scream, but there was no end. She took one more step in, and then she fell down. She screamed louder, tears falling from her eyes. She looked up to the sky, fighting to breath. She smiled _; it will end_ , she thought.

She felt weaker, she couldn't fight, so she closed her eyes; it felt like the end. But then she felt someone's hand on her waist and pulling her out. In a second she found herself out of the borders, seeking for air. Her hands were holding tight to him. _Him? Who was him?_

She looked up to meet Stefan's eyes. She was more shocked from his face; his eyes were full of tears, red. His mouth was trembling. He was worried, because of her.

She opened her mouth to talk, say sorry, probably. But instead she just burst into tears, she sobbed and screamed, her hands hitting him hard.

He pulled her closer. His jaw tightened; it was his fault. He was really mad at himself, if he was late one more second he would've lost her forever. The thought of losing her made him hold her even harder, so hard that it would hurt if she wasn't a vampire. And she kept crying, tears falling to his chest.

They sat like that for an hour. He wished that the rain would take her pain, but he knew that it was his job. She stopped sobbing after a while, tears falling silently. For the first time in a long while, she could feel peace as he held her in his lap. She stopped hitting him, but his grip stayed tight. There was no letting go. He would help her, not because he owed her, because losing Caroline Forbes from the world was a nightmare.


	7. The anchor

He watches her as she dances on top of the table, swaying along with the song and shaking her head with the rhythm. He stands and watches, his hands on his hips, amused. And there is a moment when he feels peace, when he can put the world aside and watches her dancing like that for hours. He doesn't understand how can she- after all of this, stay full of light.

They are having fun, nothing serious, enjoying their less-humanity life. And what could go wrong if they spice the events a little and play around with Tyler and Matt, as if they're toy.

After few hours, they get bored, he's sitting on the stool, and she's sitting on the table, acting as if their friends aren't lying fainted behind them.

Just then, Damon makes his way into the bar, putting his hero-on-mission face on. Since Stefan called him to update with their newest game, he knew that this has to stop before they do something both of them will regret. He was so mad and desperate that he had to use the mom card immediately.

"Oh, look who made it to the party." Stefan says, as he didn't notice Lily yet.

"I wouldn't get so excited, he seems upset." Caroline says and fakes a pout, her legs hanging from the table, going forth and back.

"Sorry kids, party's over. I have someone you need to meet, Stef." Damon says, half annoyed, half amused. He takes a step aside so Stefan can see the woman standing behind him.

Stefan's smile falls quickly as soon as he sees her, her lips turn to a soft smile. Still worried thou.

Caroline notices the weird silence, the smirk on Damon's lips, Stefan borrows getting more furrowed, something is wrong.

"Who is this?" she asks, looking at the lady.

He takes a moment before he answers, the longer he takes to answer, the bigger Damon's smirk gets.

"She's my mother." He says.

Their eyes still fixed on each other. The smile on her lips no longer exists; she's now more serious, sad. Maybe part of her expected him to run to her arms, at least that what she wanted.

"Stefan?" Caroline says, looking at him, her face clearly worried. Damon narrows his eyes at her. She better stay out of this till the process is over, he thinks.

Anyway, Stefan doesn't answer, he can't focus on anything but his mother, standing in front of him, after hundred and sixty some years.

"Hello, Stefan." Lily says, "It's good to see you again."

He doesn't know what is it, but when he hears her voice, he suddenly sees some memories, passing in his mind as photos. He blinks them away and regains his strength once more.

"What are you doing here?" He asks firmly.

"It's a long story, I wasn't really dead, Stefan." She pauses, giving him a chance to take it all in.

"I was in some prison world, for over a century. But now I'm back." She says, taking a step closer.

"Now what brother? Are you gonna hug your mother, or will you leave?" Damon asked, walking closer too.

"Think Stefan, what are you gonna do, more importantly, how do you feel?"

Stefan's eyes travel between Damon and his mother, his mouth slight opened in confusion. Caroline watches him all the time, now getting worried.

They stay silent for a moment, Stefan's face softens suddenly. It's then when Caroline feels the need to do something.

"No " she whispers to herself and takes a step closer to him. Only to be hit on the wall by Damon, his hands on her throat. "Not now blonde, I promise, once he's back we'll have all the time for you." He says in a mocking tone, thou his anger and impatience are showing.

Stefan moves a little when he sees them like that. He can't even spill one word, everything is jut overwhelming. He doesn't quite know what's happening. And before he can think, Caroline shoves Damon away, grabs some stake from the ground, one that has been there since their fight with the boys.

She vamps to him and points it to his chest, but he stops her in the middle, their hands are fighting each other, she's trying to dig the stake to his heart, and he's trying to push her away.

"You know? I'm so beyond done with you…" she pauses as she puts the stake in his skin, right under his heart, he winces at that. "I had to act normally around you, as if you never did anything to me, I had to act like you never manipulated me, fed on me, used me as your doll," she pauses again, digging it deeper, "I had to accept that you and my supposed-to-be-friends are together, I had enough of you, this has to end." She pulls it out, and about to put it in again, once and for all.

She's so close, just one second far.

And then his voice breaks into her.

"Caroline."

She hears him from behind, his shout is nothing compared to his face, not just scared, but lost.

She purses her lips in anger, she was trying her best to keep him with her, actually to keep him away from her.

But that look, he was back. She takes a long moment staring into his eyes. The idea of her joining him passes her mind. but she blinks it away quickly.

He was back again, Stefan, the one who was scared of his feelings, who pushed it away, she wasn't getting back to that. She drops the stake next to her and pulls her fingers from Damon's jacket. She looks at his mother then him.

"Well, I think he was right, the party is over." She says, and in a second she's out of the bar.

He looks quickly at the door, swinging behind her. He looks back at Damon who is getting up from the table she pushed him on. Then back to his mother, he suddenly doesn't feel his legs anymore. He falls on the flour, his face still shocked. One tear escapes his eyes. And then he feels it all.

He thinks of her the first thing, he tries to ignore the pain and the guilt. And instead he thinks of her, he think about her when she's back. He knows that he has to choose something to focus on, and he chooses her.


	8. The beginning

As the bell rang, the hallway was suddenly full of students, the noise was loud, people talking and laughing, most importantly, they were alive. Their pulse was so loud for him, he felt as if the scene was in slow motion, everything moving slowly. He turned away and closed his eyes, his veins changed, but he calmed them down, breathing in and out.

"Hey there."He heard from behind him.

[[MORE]]

He took a moment before he turned around.

It was that girl again, that one from chemistry class.

She was beaming so happily, and it kinda made him smile.

"Hey." He said.

"I'm Caroline Forbes." She said as she reached her shook it.

"I'm Stefan S-" he said, but she interrupted him.

"Stefan Salvatore, the new guy. I know." She said with a only smiled.

"So, What brought you to our beloved Mystic Falls?" She said, rolling her eyes.

"Um, I used to live here, but uh, my family left town for a while."

"Wait, you're Stefan Salvatore as Zach Salvatore's cousin?" she asked, her eyes shining with nodded with a smile."Which means you live in the boarding house? Wow. I always loved that place."

Again, he just smiled.

"Caroline, Come on, the team is waiting you." Some girl said as she passed them, clearly in a rush.

"Oh, okay one more thing." She said.

"When is your birthday?" She asked with big shining smile.

"Sorry, what-?"

"You know, birthday, the day you were born?"

"Um, first of October. Why do-?"Favorite Color?"

His eyebrows got furrowed, but he answered anyway, "Blue."

"Great." She said with a bigger smile, "Well, I guess that's it for now. I'll see you around." She said with a wink, as she started to walk away.

He turned around and watched her leaving, totally amazed. Something in her got him speechless, perhaps her big smile, or the way her eyes shine with excitement, or the way she does whatever she wants without thinking.

He doesn't know her, yet. But somehow, these few minutes she stood with him, he felt lighter, he forgot about everything else, he felt _alive_.


	9. That's what friends do

They fall in uncomfortable silent. He doesn't understand, the reason behind this twist in his gut, or why he's embarrassed that she saw them, they were just hugging, and even if not, why does he care? They're friends.

He blinks the thoughts away as Elena talks.

"Well, uh, I should go look for Bonnie." She says as she walks to the door, she smiles to Caroline. But that smile doesn't last much as it gets replaced with annoyance.

God knows that Katherine Pierce couldn't care less about Bonnie Bennett. Most importantly, she hates the idea that Stefan and Caroline will be alone, because now, Caroline is at the top of her 'Dangerous' list.

But, she had to behave like the beloved Elena Gilbert would.

He doesn't move, only puts his hands in his pockets and look at her as she takes off her necklace.

"I guess the party didn't go well for you." He says with a smile.

"At least one of us had fun." She says slowly, looking at him from the corner of her eyes as she puts the jewelry into some box.

He furrows his eyebrows and purses his lips innocently, as if he has no idea what she's talking about.

She looks at him and raises her eyebrows, clearly not buying his acting.

What did he expect? She would always read him as an open book.

"Oh, you mean…" he says, still faking the innocent surprise.

But when she raises her eyebrows higher, he knows that it's not working.

He sighs then, accepting his failure.

"Listen, it's not what you think; she was just… being a friend." He says and looks at her eyes, searching if she believes him.

"That's not my business." She says with a smile and walks pass him to her bed side.

He turns around and looks at her, "No, of course it's your business, Caroline. You get to know, and you also get to say your opinions, that what friends do." He says, his eyes desperate to make her understand.

But she does, and that's the problem.

"I just want you to know that you can tell me anything, anytime." She says. Using her hand while talking, something she does when she's nervous.

And why is she even nervous?

They stare at each other for a moment, not talking.

"I don't want you to get hurt." She says, her voice low.

"That's all." She finishes as she shakes her head with a big fake smile.

He only nods and smiles.

Something is wrong, but he doesn't know what, and he doesn't want to.


	10. Shattered walls

It was very quiet in the boarding house; everyone was sleeping after the long night and the loud party, everyone but her.

She spent a long while staring at the ceiling, her hands resting on her stomach. She suddenly felt so empty, as if she was the last person on the planet, all alone, by herself.

She realized that this is what it feels like when you fight what you need, while you have it right there, next to you, but yet you keep pushing it away. You start to lose yourself with it.

She closed her eyes for the millionth time in an hour, trying to fall asleep and shut all the voices in her mind.

And then she gave up, the night seemed so long and lonely, that she gave up, she just wanted to touch it, to be close to her redeem, to her salvation.

She walked slowly on her tiptoes, the hallway was so dark and quiet. It's a good thing that his room was close to hers.

His door was half open, and she stood there for a moment before getting in, thinking whether this was the right thing or not, it's dangerous, and with one move, can shatter all the walls she's been building for so long.

She could end up exposed, with nothing to cover her bare heart which is dying for him.

She swallowed hard before she took a step into the room.

She stood in front of his sleepy body and tilted her head; a smile pulled up on her lips as she watched him sleeping peacefully.

She's never in her short life, seen someone more peaceful than that, his messy hair still perfect, his eyes closed, he looked like an angel.

Although the fact that she's seen his dark side, that she had seen the ripper in his glory, killing and manipulating, this one seemed everything but.

She still couldn't understand how someone like him could fall for her.

It was true that she always denied his words for the last month, that she always thought to herself that he's wrong, that those words coming out of his mouth were delusion, that he just needed his friend in his life that he misunderstood it and called it something else.

But deep down, she knew that he wasn't lying, that his feelings were true, perhaps that's what scared her, she felt like she doesn't deserve that, she doesn't deserve him to forgive her for everything that she put him through, for being anther failure.

She doesn't deserve to be loved, by him.

And that what lead them to the goodbye, last dance, last kiss, last "I love you", even thou it was the first.

It was their last page in that chapter; after she decided that they needed to be friends, only friends. Because it turned out, that they can't be more, her words, not his.

But yet, there she was, after a month from what was supposed to be the end, she was unable to forget what it felt like, to have a thing with him. She found herself going back to those moments, their last dance, last kiss; it was her little world that she escaped to, every time she was alone.

And then she realized that she can do this, she can be his friend, and mourn what they could've been at the same time.

Her plan was going so well, he couldn't even tell for sure if she was still having feelings for him or not, sometimes he would see that look on her eyes, when he's supposed to be looking away, and he would feel like she needs him like he does. But sometimes, he hears her talking with Bonnie about how she's happy to be friends with him again.

So yeah, her plan was going well, except for the fact that she was at his bedroom at midnight, only few steps away from him.

She suddenly felt as if her heart was down in her stomach, she needed to remind herself that this was her choice, to stay away from him, that she also deserved this, after everything she'd done, it was the least punishment she could have.

But she couldn't stop it, that feeling that made her hand move to reach his face, she just needed to feel him, just for once, she needed something to keep her going.

Her vision became blur as her eyes were already watering. Her hands were few inches away from his cheek, her fingers slowly opening to touch him.

 _"I'll always be there, just remember that."_

His words echoed in her head, when he made it clear that he'll wait for her to change her mind.

Her fingers pulled back into fest, and her hand was back to her side, she let out a sigh, that only she could hear.

She smiled at him with bitterness, and then turned around and started to walk away.

Only then his eyes opened, so wide and awake, as he was clearly not a sleep for the whole night.

He looked at her from behind as she walked to the door. His eyebrows got furrowed.

He clinched his teeth and swallowed hard, he didn't know if he should be happy to know that she still felt something for him, or heartbroken that she was trying to hide it.

He just needed one sign, to know if she still needs him, if she still wants him, and he would fight the world for her.

He didn't give it much thought, as he got out of bed and walked to her room, she was already under her sheets, defiantly awake.

He walked to the bed and slid next to her; she turned around and looked at him, confused.

"Stefan, what are you doing here?" she asked in a low voice.

"I couldn't sleep." He said with his eyes closed, as he was already lying next to her, and reaching to hug her with his arms.

She remained silent, a sad smile on her face. She gave in to him and let him pull her to his chest.

Her face was buried in his neck, her hands resting against his chest, as one of his hands was under her and the other was hugging her waist.

"It's also cold." He whispered.

She smiled again.

"I couldn't sleep either." She said after a while.

 _"I know." He said in his mind._

She could finally be close to him, she could finally touch him.

The feeling of his chest against her hands made her warm from the inside. His hand playing with her hair took all her emptiness away.

She wondered if he felt her in his room, and that what brought him here. And he wondered if she knew that she doesn't have to hide from him.

"Stefan?" she whispered into the dark.

"Yeah?" He answers with his eyes closed.

"Thank you." She said after a moment.

And they fell asleep, for the first time in a long time, they didn't feel alone.


	11. I'll keep you warm

It's almost midnight when he opens the door to his apartment, he puts the keys on the table next to the door, the place is quiet which doesn't happen often. His roommate, Caroline, is always loud, turning all the lights on, listening to some music while studying.

But today she's sick, he told her that he can stay with her but she didn't let him, _it's a Saturday night, go, see some girls_ , she said. As if he's any interest in seeing girls while he's so in love with her. It's not like she doesn't know, she does, actually he's sure she feels the same way about him, but she's got lots of things going around; her mother died few months ago, and she made some stupid mistakes while grieving, she then had to deal with ex- boyfriend drama, friends drama, and Stefan's drama.

Anyway, she needed more time to control her life, and he didn't push, which got them into this roommates-with feelings for each other- waiting for the right moment- so we'll just be friends situation.

He walks to her room and looks through the half opened door. She is lying in the middle of the bed, handkerchiefs surrounding her, three empty mugs on the table next to her.

He looks at her, covered in two sheets and still shaking a bit, he can only see her hair peeking out of the covers.

"You're freezing," He says. "Are you gonna do something about it?"

"Stefan, hey." She says as she gets her head out of the covers, her voice is cracking and her nose is red as a tomato, and it makes him love her even more.

"How was your night?" She asks, smiling.

"Good," He says as he gets into the room, smiling. "Though I'd rather stay here, with you."

"I'm okay. Really." She says and the way he tilts his head at her tells her that he doesn't buy it.

"I'm freezing." She admits with a shake of her head.

"Well, where're the others covers?" He looks around in her room, even though the lights are off and he can't see anything.

"Those are all I have, remember?" She rolls her eyes. And he just nods and leaves the room.

"Where are you going?" She asks loudly, and regrets it soon when her throat hurts.

He comes back with covers in his hands that she can't see his face.

"What are you doing?" She asks as he puts the covers gently on her.

"But how are you gonna sleep?"

"I'll figure it out." He says while covering her.

"No, Stefan, you'll freeze." She says.

"Other way, you will. So…" He says.

She sighs and looks around, then back to him. "Fine, then you'll sleep with me." She says.

He raises his eyebrows at her words and smiles slightly.

"I mean sleep sleep, like fall into sleep, like you know with our eyes closed." She says in a rush, her hands moving to help her make a point, when she looks at him, he's smiling and if she wasn't sick in bed she would hit him, but instead she just says shut up and rolls her eyes.

She looks at him, and the smiles on their faces fades quickly, they stare at each other for a while before she breaks the silence, "So…" She says in a low voice.

He smiles and nods his head before he walks around the bed to the other side, he takes off his shoes and gets on the bed.

She doesn't turn around, her hands on her stomach as she stares into nothing. She remembers the last time they shared a bed, it was completely different.

His hands break through her thoughts as they wrap around her, he's suddenly next to her, and his face is buried in her curls.

"Just to warm you up a little." He says, his voice muffled into her hair.

She smiles a little as she lets out a shaky breath.

"You don't happen to be drunk, do you?" She asks and he can hear the smile in her voice.

"No, I'm not."He bites the inside of his cheeks, "Though I might regret it now."

She bites her lips to hold that chuckle, which escapes anyway.


	12. I'll keep you warm AU

It's almost midnight when he opens the door to his apartment, he puts the keys on the table next to the door, the place is quiet which doesn't happen often. His roommate, Caroline, is always loud, turning all the lights on, listening to some music while studying.

But today she's sick, he told her that he can stay with her but she didn't let him, _it's a Saturday night, go, see some girls_ , she said. As if he's any interest in seeing girls while he's so in love with her. It's not like she doesn't know, she does, actually he's sure she feels the same way about him, but she's got lots of things going around; her mother died few months ago, and she made some stupid mistakes while grieving, she then had to deal with ex- boyfriend drama, friends drama, and Stefan's drama.

Anyway, she needed more time to control her life, and he didn't push, which got them into this roommates-with feelings for each other- waiting for the right moment- so we'll just be friends situation.

He walks to her room and looks through the half opened door. She is lying in the middle of the bed, handkerchiefs surrounding her, three empty mugs on the table next to her.

He looks at her, covered in two sheets and still shaking a bit, he can only see her hair peeking out of the covers.

"You're freezing," He says. "Are you gonna do something about it?"

"Stefan, hey." She says as she gets her head out of the covers, her voice is cracking and her nose is red as a tomato, and it makes him love her even more.

"How was your night?" She asks, smiling.

"Good," He says as he gets into the room, smiling. "Though I'd rather stay here, with you."

"I'm okay. Really." She says and the way he tilts his head at her tells her that he doesn't buy it.

"I'm freezing." She admits with a shake of her head.

"Well, where're the others covers?" He looks around in her room, even though the lights are off and he can't see anything.

"Those are all I have, remember?" She rolls her eyes. And he just nods and leaves the room.

"Where are you going?" She asks loudly, and regrets it soon when her throat hurts.

He comes back with covers in his hands that she can't see his face.

"What are you doing?" She asks as he puts the covers gently on her.

"But how are you gonna sleep?"

"I'll figure it out." He says while covering her.

"No, Stefan, you'll freeze." She says.

"Other way, you will. So…" He says.

She sighs and looks around, then back to him. "Fine, then you'll sleep with me." She says.

He raises his eyebrows at her words and smiles slightly.

"I mean sleep sleep, like fall into sleep, like you know with our eyes closed." She says in a rush, her hands moving to help her make a point, when she looks at him, he's smiling and if she wasn't sick in bed she would hit him, but instead she just says shut up and rolls her eyes.

She looks at him, and the smiles on their faces fades quickly, they stare at each other for a while before she breaks the silence, "So…" She says in a low voice.

He smiles and nods his head before he walks around the bed to the other side, he takes off his shoes and gets on the bed.

She doesn't turn around, her hands on her stomach as she stares into nothing. She remembers the last time they shared a bed, it was completely different.

His hands break through her thoughts as they wrap around her, he's suddenly next to her, and his face is buried in her curls.

"Just to warm you up a little." He says, his voice muffled into her hair.

She smiles a little as she lets out a shaky breath.

"You don't happen to be drunk, do you?" She asks and he can hear the smile in her voice.

"No, I'm not."He bites the inside of his cheeks, "Though I might regret it now."

She bites her lips to hold that chuckle, which escapes anyway.


	13. New story AU

He leaves his book and stands up quickly when he hears a scream coming from the apartment against his.

He runs to the window and opens it to see a young lady, opening her window and shooting something away with her hand.

She seems embarrassed when she notices him looking at her.

"Is everything okay?" He asks.

"Um, yeah, I was just trying to scare that bird away." She says. "I can't sleep from his voice."

"You're the new neighbor?" He says it as a fact more than a question.

"Yeah." She smiles.

"If I were you I'd drop it, that bird has been living here before me. He loves this tree." He says with a smile.

"What? I didn't sigh for this." She says with annoyance.

"You'll get used." He says.

She sighs as she leans on the window frame.

"You've been here for how long?" She asks.

"Five years." He nods.

"Wow." Her eyes widen. "Well maybe you can help me with the new place."

He doesn't have the opportunity to talk as she continues, eyes widen, hands moving in the air with excitement, "You can like tell me everything about the building, oh and I can cook you sometimes, oh oh and we can like, watch movies together and maybe…" She pauses as she notices his eyebrows raised.

"Sorry," She says, hands reaching to cover her forehead. "It's just you're the first normal human being that I see in this building, and I don't know anyone in this town and my friends aren't here and I'm just…" She pauses again when she notices that she's bumbling again.

"It's okay." He smiles with closed eyes. "I understand."

"You should know though, I'm not a good company at all. I can be really boring." He says.

"Ah, don't worry; I'll take care of that." She smirks, and then looks inside her apartment quickly, and he can tell that she's panicking.

"What's that smell?" She says, then her eyes widen. "Oh my god, the cake." She runs in quickly then comes back in less than a second.

"Sorry, I forgot, I'm Caroline." She smiles.

"Stefan." He chuckles.

"Stefan? Okay, Stefan." She beams then looks inside the apartment again. "I'll just…" She says in a rush as she motions with her hand to what know seems like the source of the smoke.

"Yeah, go." He says with a smile.

Then she's gone.

He can't help it but smile as he gets back to his couch and opens his book once more. And he laughs when he hears her screaming again. This is gonna be so fun.


	14. Someday? AU

Bag on shoulder, book in one hand, coffee in the other.

She lets out a breath as she gets on the bus, her hand leaning on the cushion as she looks for a seat, and the bus is unsurprisingly busy, it's always the same at this time of the day.

Her eyes wander around and find that seat empty, she looks to the guy sitting on the seat next to it, and she immediately understands why the other girl chose to stand instead of taking it.

He seems in the twenty of his age, well dressed, that grey t-shirt is actually perfect, perfect hair, beautiful eyes, sad but beautiful. Everything about him is fine, except for those scars on his face, and from the way he holds his hands and strokes them says that there are some on them as well.

She looks around and takes a deep breath before she walks to the seat next to him. He looks at her from the corner of his eyes then back to his hands.

She puts the bag on her lap and the book on it then holds the coffee with both her hands. She swallows as she looks around, trying so hard not to look at him.

She can't help it but look at him from the corner of her eyes, then looks away quickly when he sees her. Her grip tightens around the coffee as she licks her lips and looks away.

She can see him staring at her, and the noise in the street and people talking in the bus doesn't help.

She looks back at him and she finally meets his eyes, there's something in them that makes her want to hug him, or reach to his furrowed eyebrows and make them relax with her fingers, but she doesn't, of course she doesn't.

"I didn't know that there're bar fights in the afternoon." She says, smiling a bit.

"There aren't." He says, his eyes never blinking, looking directly into her eyes. She feels uncomfortable under his gaze that she has to look away for a second before looking back again.

She stares at the wound in his cheek, and she notices that it's actually bleeding. She holds the coffee with one hand and searches for handkerchiefs in the bag with the other one.

He looks at her hands and opens his mouth to say something, but chooses not to.

"Hold this." She says as she gives him her coffee and ignores his raised eyebrows as she wipes the blood with the handkerchief.

She also ignores his gaze as she wipes his cheek slowly and carefully, but she can notice him swallowing.

"Here." She mumbles as she finishes.

She then takes the coffee from his hand and hands him the handkerchief, she motions to his hand as she sits straightly and takes the first sip from that coffee.

He takes a moment staring at her before he starts to wipe his hand, and there might be a slight smile on his lips.

Her smile is even bigger as she looks around.

"You know I can be some serial killer right?" He says without looking up.

"Nah," She says. "Serial killers don't have hero hair." She looks at his hair and smiles.

And it actually surprises her when he chuckles, she couldn't imagine him laughing at any cost. Perhaps it's the eyebrows, or the broody look.

"Uh, brother drama." He says without looking up from his hands.

She opens her mouth to talk, but she thinks better of it and only smiles.

"We all have some drama in our lives." She says. "I don't have siblings though, so I won't give advices." She chuckles as his smile gets bigger.

He looks up then, his gaze so intense; he looks at her like he knows her for so long.

"I'm Stefan." He says, reaching his hand and quickly regretting it because of the blood. However she takes his hand without hesitation.

"Caroline." She says with a smile.

They both keep gazing for a moment, still holding hands. She decides that he looks much better with that smile than the broody look.

And maybe she'll see him laughing too, someday?


	15. Filling the holes

He walks into her house, from what she said he understands that they used to spend time here. But of course he doesn't remember. However, that doesn't stop her from telling him hundred stories about them, from the first time he came to town, to the day he was leaving town but got stuck in a safe instead.

He noticed something in her stories about her having a crush on him, he doesn't know much details because she didn't say anything further. She keeps trying to cover all his history, she tells him everything she knows about him, whether she's included or not.

He sits at that couch as she talks from the kitchen, telling him about that time she drove his car, not leaving any tiny detail.

"You know? I still don't remember anything." He says as she puts the coffee on the table in front of him before sitting on her chair.

"Of course you won't." She says with a smile. "You didn't fall down the stairs, Stefan. Some witch fried your brain, it's not like you'll just remember everything in a flinch." She smiles as she takes a sip of her coffee.

"Then why are you telling me all of this?" He asks as he leans closer.

"Because you're my best friend." She says with closed eyes as she lets out a breath. "And I just don't want you to feel lost or lonely, and if that means that I have to tell you your history myself then that's exactly what I'm gonna do."

She's smiling again, and he can't help it but smile too.

"Is that why you got me here? Because I'm your best friend?" He asks.

"Well, I wasn't gonna leave you sleep in the graveyard or something." She scoffs. "Besides, this isn't the first time. Months ago you…" She pauses and clinches her jaw. "You left your house and you stayed here. So this place is pretty much your home." She smiles and winks at him as she sits back in her chair.

"And let me guess, I left my house because of them." He raises his eyebrows.

She opens her mouth then closes it again, offering a smile instead.

"Listen, it's just who you're, you're good and kind and human. Trust me; you're one of the best people that I know." She says, ignoring the need to say that he _is_ the best person she knows.

He tries to shake that stupid grin on his lips; he still can't believe that they're just friends. But didn't she say that she had a crush on him? What happened to that?

He looks around in amusement.

"Well, maybe you can tell me more about you having a crush on me." He says with an obvious smirk.

"Oh god." She laughs while shaking her head.

"Did we ever…?" He pauses as he smirks and wiggles his eyebrows at her.

Her laughter is so loud, echoing through the empty house. It's something about the way she leans forward, closing her eyes and clapping her hands while laughing, it's something about the house's smell, something about the bonfire that makes him feel alive.

She catches him staring at her in a way she's never seen. Through all these years, Stefan Salvatore never looked at her like that.

"What?" She says.

"Nothing." He says.


	16. Ended from the beginning

"No you didn't. oh my god." She says to her friend on the phone as she laughs hysterical. She walks down the street while playing with her keys.

"Oh I did." Bonnie says.

"Bonnie Bennett, you're a bad-ass, this can't be discussed through the phone." She says.

And she only gets 'mhm' from the other end.

The street is very calm when she reaches her car, there's no one around. She's just about to open the car when she hears it. The sound of tires rubbing against the asphalt, she looks around quickly and sees someone lying on the ground.

"Oh my god." She says under her breath.

"Caroline? What's going on?" Bonnie says through the phone, clearly worried.

"Bonnie I'll call you back." She says before hanging up. Then she's running to him.

"Are you okay?" She asks before sitting on her knees next to him.

He winces without moving, his eyes opening slowly.

"Hey, do you hear me?" she says. "Are you okay?" She asks again.

His hands move to his stomach as he coughs. She looks around for any blood but there isn't, except for that wound on his forehead.

"Are you okay?" She asks again, her voice louder this time.

He finally opens his eyes. His breath is surprisingly even.

"I'm fine." He says.

"Let me help you." She says before helping him to get up. They're now sitting in the middle of the street, and for her surprise no one is around them. Was she the only one who heard the accident?

She opens her bag to get some handkerchiefs to wipe the blood on his forehead, but for her surprise when she looks up, the wound has gone, nothing left but few blood drops. She looks down to his hand, and the scratches are also gone.

She meets his eyes and he's waiting for her to talk.

"Oh my god." She whispers. "You're…" She doesn't complete as she stands up and backs away, when she turns around to run he's suddenly in front of her.

"Calm down," He says, looking directly to her eyes. "Youwill walk away and you'll forget everything you saw, there wasn't an accident and you didn't see me." He says and she stares without saying anything, she just nods.

And then he's gone.

She looks around slowly but he's nowhere to be found. Her hand goes up to hold her necklace; she takes a deep breath before walking back to her car.

Who would know that vervain would actually help her one day?


	17. Not that bad AU

"Mr. Salvatore, you got a visitor."

He looks up to the nurse; she's about fifty years old, give or take. And she's been very kind to him for the last 37 hours.

His eyebrows get furrowed, who'd possibly come visit him?

He looks at the door and sees blond curls shining under the sunlight coming through the window. There's a shy smile on her lips as she walks in. and… wait, are those flowers in her hand? Hold on… isn't that the same girl from…?

"'I'll leave you alone." Comes out from the nurse and cuts his thoughts, he look at her while she offers a smile and walks away.

"How are you doing?" She says as she sits on the chair next to the bed. Her voice is forcing him to relax, soft and beautiful, he noticed that before.

"I'm fine, thank you." He says with a smile.

He waits for her to talk, but she doesn't say anything, she looks down to the flowers in her hand and bites her lips.

"Listen, I'm incredibly sorry for what happened." She finally talks. "I really appreciate your help, I can't imagine what would happen if you weren't there, and I'm really really sorry for…" She pauses and points with her eyes to his body lying on the bed.

"It's okay." He assures her with a smile. And he can notice the relief in her eye, how her shoulders relax and that breath she lets out.

"Is it bad?" She asks, her face reflecting sympathy again as she looks to his foot wrapped in plaster.

"ah, broken leg, not a big deal." He smiles again, this time bigger one.

She lets out a stressed chuckle.

"I'm so so sorry." She says. "If there's anything that I can do…" She pauses with a smile.

"I'd tell you." He nods.

"Though, I was thinking, that guy, are you like…?" He trails off, his question already clear.

"Um, we… we broke up." She purses her lips.

"Is that why he was… fighting with you?" he says. His voice low, trying not to push.

"We, uh, we were talking, but he got angry. I mean I was shocked, Tyler can get angry sometimes, but I never saw him like that." She shakes her head slowly. And he just nods.

"Well, it's a good thing that I was at the bar." He scuffs and she chuckles.

"'I brought you flowers." She says after few moments in silence. She gives him the flowers and he takes it gently, a stupid grin on his lips.

The roses are beautiful, light pink, just like her cheeks.

"Thank you." He says, failing to control that growing smile on his lips.

"Does anyone know that you're here?" She asks as she looks around the room.

"Um, my brother is out of town, and my best friend has some job to do, but she'll be here like in seven hours or something." He says.

"Oh." She says. and he's quite amused with looking at her, how her eyes give away everything she thinks or feels. So he waits for the rest.

"Well, I can stay for a little longer." She says with a big shining smile.

"You don't have to."

"No please, it's the least I can do for you, I mean you wouldn't be here if you didn't help me." She titles her head and smiles. And he only nods with agreement.

"So," She says while beaming, her eyes shining with excitement, "I'll go get us some food and drinks, I mean it's okay right? It's just your leg, and I can get you some magazines?"

"I don't read magazines." He shakes his head.

"Oh, books?"

He nods with a smile.

"Okay, there's a bookshop in the next street. I'll take care of it." She says as she stands up and just before he can talk she looks at him with pointed finger, "End of discussion." She says before heading to the door with a smile.


	18. Heal

_Empty street._

 _Orange lights._

 _Cold breeze._

 _And a heart next to his body on the ground. then she's running to him, holding his dead body and shouting her lungs out. But nothing comes out. She keeps screaming but no one hears her, even she can't hear herself._

Her eyes shut open, and her body jumps off the bed as if she was falling in her dream. She takes a deep breath and closes her eyes; it was a dream. She curses herself for having those dreams until now, it's been three weeks. And shouldn't she have dreams about her dead friend? He's alive now, so why can't she forget about it?

Her mind is blowing. Many questions but no answers. Something had changed ever since that night; the idea of losing Stefan changed something in her. She doesn't know what is it, or why. But it's something, and it's killing her.

She doesn't like how it makes her feel,having someone in her life that she'd do anything for. literally anything.

She has no control over anything in her life.

She can't bring her friends back, she can't understand Elena, She can't fix the spell on their town. And she can't stop herself from walking out of her room, wrapping her jacket around her as she stands in front of his door. It was a good choice to have his room next to hers.

She hesitates before opening the door. She doesn't move for a moment, her hand still holding the door as she listens. His heart is beating. And it makes her whole body relax. The rhythm of his pulse makes her close her eyes and take a deep breath.

She doesn't know how or when, but she's standing right there, in the middle of his room. She swallows hard as she looks at him. She walks slowly to his side of the bed, her eyes wandering on his body. And for her relief , his heart is in its place.

She puts a strand of hair behind her ear and crosses her arms against her chest as she watches him. And by now, she doesn't know if the pulse she's hearing is his own or hers. She can feel her heart pumping out of her chest.

She lets out a breath and shakes her head, mentally rolling her eyes for her lack of control as she pushes the blanket away and sits next to him. Her eyes are still on his face as she starts to lie on the bed.

She looks at his face one more time before settling her head on his chest, exactly on his heart. She feels a shiver going through her as she listens to his pulse, so loud, so steady and so close.

She closes her eyes as she rests her hand against his chest. Breathing in and out; trying to match his breath, just like she did years ago in that bathroom.

She finally starts to relax, her heartbeats calming down. And then she feels his hand on her arm, stroking it gently. Her eyes open, but she doesn't move. Yet, her hand clutches to his shirt. As his other hand goes up to her head, moving back and forth on her hair.

She wants to capture that moment, right here, right now. She wants to remember this feeling forever. His hand on her arm, warming her up. And his other hand on her hair, stroking it as if she was his own. It's one touch, and all the pain is gone. One touch makes her feel new, alive.

She closes her eyes, inhaling his scent, memorizing his touch. In her whole life, she never felt protected like that. It was like he was holding her in his arms, preventing her from breaking, holding her together.

She hears him sighing and she can feel the pain in his bones. The weight he's been carrying for so long. She wants to comfort him, but instead he's the one holding her in his embrace.

Little does she know, that all what he needs to heal is to have her right there.

Next to his heart.

Wrapped in his arms, as if she was _his_.


	19. Too late, too soon

It's new feeling, new concept. To have someone _waiting_ for her. She tries not to think about it a lot, but whenever she's alone she does.

Not just when she's alone to be honest. Sometimes she thinks about it when she's with Bonnie at their dorm. Or when she's at the grill with Matt. Or when she's staring blankly at the professor while he rambles about something she no longer cares about it. Okay, so she might be thinking about it quite a lot.

But be it. It's her sweet torture.

She acknowledges the fact that the thought of him is slowly eating her mind. And she knows that she should think about other things more often. Because she's not the kind of girl whose life spin around some boy.

But he's not just a boy. He's Stefan Salvatore. Just his name makes her mind go dizzy. He's the one who was always there for her, who believed in her when everyone doubted her. He's the one who saved her life. He's her _friend_.

But most importantly, he's the one she loves.

She realizes that the more she knows him, the more she falls for him. She reached a point where the idea of loving him is the most normal thing in her life. It's no longer a surprise, in fact she can't remember a time when she didn't love him.

But that doesn't mean that she's ready. She's anything but.

It's quite confusing, that little twist in her gut. It's the idea that's growing in her mind. That the more she loves him, the more she's not ready for him.

She fell in love more than once in her short life, but she can't recall a time when she felt this way. Having this one person in the world whome she'd do anything for. Someone that she'd go through hell for. Someone that she's willing to give anything away, just to be next to him everyday of her immortal life. Someone that she loves in every meaning of the word. Not that she think he's flawless. Not at all, she's aware of his flaws, of his history, of his darkness. And She never thought less of him. And it scares her.

She fell in love before, yes. But she could always control it. But now with those feelings for him overwhelming her and controlling every bone of her. She doesn't like it.

And for a control freak, that's a nightmare.

So she pushes it away. Tries to shut all her feelings down, even thou she's failing. But she won't give in.

She won't lose control.

She suddenly feels determinate as she gulps down another shot. _Yes, I won't give in_. she thinks to herself.

It feels good,having control.

But it's all gone when he walks through the door of the grill and walks to her. Hands in his pockets, wearing that v-neck T-shirt underneath the jeans jacket. Damn, he's good looking. She thinks.

She looks down to her glass, trying to hide her red cheeks. And _seriously?! I'm blushing because he looks good?!_

He takes a seat next to her and smiles to Matt as he puts a glass in front of him. He can share Caroline's bottle anyway.

"Hey." He says.

"Hey." She says, her voice is over-excited, trying to sound casual.

"What are you doing here?" He says with a smile. And why is he giving her his full attention? The least he could do is to sit properly on his stool instead of shooting heart eyes in her direction.

"I thought I can hang out with Matt a little." She smiles, "What are you doing here?"

"I went to your dorm and Bonnie told me you're here, so…" He trails off as he holds his glass in a cheers gesture. Never breaking the eye contact as he swallows down the liquid. And there's that stupid dreamy smile on his face. But it's been there a lot lately.

She drinks with him. And tries to focus on something else other than his eyes. There's that ugly yellow bag that hangs on a chair pass his shoulder. She focuses on that.

Two hours later, they're already through their third bottle. The place is louder, and now full with high school kids hanging around.

She laughs Hysterically about something stupid while he just smiles. When she looks at him through her giggles, she thinks that his smile is too steady to be drunk. And then she realizes that maybe he's not even drunk, not like at her at least.

Perhaps because he's older, or maybe because he didn't drink half what she did.

She stares into his eyes little longer than she should. She can blame the alcohol for that. And yes, even when she's drunk to dead, she can't shake him off.

It's that look on his face that takes her off guard. Because yes she got used to loving him, but she's not used to him loving her.

He looks at her as if she's the stars in a dark night, like she's the first person he sees on a deserted island.

And then there's that little curve of his lips as he gets lost in her eyes. Not that she minds, she's lost too.

Her drunk mind stops her from noticing who leans in first, and it doesn't matter. All what matters is that they're few inches apart and she doesn't want to pull back. She knows that this, right here is losing control. But she doesn't care. She's too tired to care. She's getting impatient with herself actually. Because staying away from him, is pointless. And stupid. And completely mental.

She's sober by now. And she can see that he's nervous. The way he clinches his jaw, eyebrows furrowing. The way his mouth open and close in instant. Or the way his eyes drift to her lips.

She knows that it's not right, not like this. But she's been waiting for so long that she just wants to taste it for once.

He closes his eyes long before she does. He doesn't move nor flinch.

He waits for her.

It's slow but fast, their lips barely touching. He's not even sure if it is kiss. But the way his throat tighten and his heart races, he knows it's.

She pulls back, and sits straight in her seat. Hands on her legs and eyes wandering around.

It takes him a moment to open his eyes, and another one to breath again. He swallows as he switches in his stool to face the bar. Fingers playing with the glass as he looks away.

If someone was watching them from a distant, he'd be completely startled.

Two people drinking together, then laughing together. Then kissing for less than a minute, then avoiding each other's gaze.

But it's not confusing at all. It's _waiting_.


	20. You and I

They survive, of course they survive. It's what they always do. It's how he became hundred and seventy-some years. And it's how she got through her life.

So, yes. They always do.

But this time it's different. Because it's no longer _I_ survived, it's _we_ survived.

They survived the curse of their lives. They survived the death of her mother, they survived the evil of his mother. They survived everything and everyone driving them apart, but most, they survived waiting.

And no matter how long it's been, it will always be new to him. To have someone right there, next to him. It feels good to have her. And not worry for everyday of his life if she still loves him, if she will leave him for his brother. It feels good to have someone who loves him more than he loves himself.

It's those moments when the sun is so far from showing up. When the sky is in its darkest. When she's right there, lying next to him. Already drifted to sleep by now. When he spends little too long time staring at her, hair all over her face as she lays on her stomach with one hand above the pillow and the other stretched over the bed.

When there's blue light coming from outside and making her skin glow. When his hands reach to put her hair away from her cheeks, and he smiles at her beautiful face.

He remebers those days when they were falling apart, when he walked away, when she 'hated' him. He remembers the dark that they were pulled into, and he remembers coming back.

He remembers her needing her own time. He remembers waiting, god he remembers the torture of it, of dancing around each other with those feelings on the table, and yet ignoring them. He remember the need to hold her and kiss her, and not being able to do it. He remembers those kisses they shared at the end of the day, he remembers the mornings after and how they didn't talk about it.

He remembers it all.

Losing each other for what seemed like the millionth time. And giving up to what they needed, because they just needed each other.

And honestly, he doesn't regret any of it nor wish to change it.

Of course he'd rather be with her earlier. But all this history between them, it's worth it. Wakeing up next to her everyday is worth it. Holding her hands is worth it.

They literally have it all.

And he loves all of it.

He loves it when she hides behind a door to startle him, and he loves how he pretends to be actually startled. He loves when she comes back home with seven dresses – because she felt like shopping, and insists on trying all of them for him. He loves when she kicks his ass in cooking, and the fact that she's only one in his long life who succeeded to.

He loves when they walk down the street and she holds his hand, and how he spins her and start dancing. He's quite aware of the fact that now, he's a big fan of dancing. Dancing with her.

He loves when she introduces him to one of her friends as her friend and boyfriend.

He loves when he catches her staring at him, and how her cheeks turn red after that. He loves the fact, that after all this time, it feels like they got together just yesterday. Everything is the same, her body still tenses when he reaches for her hand. Her heart races when he leans in to kiss her. Oh, he loves it when her heart races.

They walk hand in hand, heading for the beach. And she's beaming like a little girl.

Her head rests on his chest as they lie on the sand, her hand rests just above his heart, eyes closed.

His hands play absently with her hair, it's become a habit by now. He stares to the sky and lets it all sink in. The voice of waves crashing on the shore, the cold breeze hitting his cheeks. The scent of her.

Only now he realizes, that maybe this is how it's supposed to be, happy and peaceful. that it's not always about pain and guilt, there mustn't be someone to run from. That it actually wasn't love that he knew before.

He smiles at the thought of having forever with her, of living everyday of their life in this heaven.

"So," he trails off. "Does that mean that you're ready?"

He can feel her lips pulling into a smile against his chest. Her fingers moving gently to his shoulder, eyes still closed.

"I guess so." She says.


	21. Just friends

"So let me get this straight." Damon says with narrowed eyes, sitting on the couch and staring at his brother who's pacing around the room. "Our beloved mother and her crazy friends threaten to kill your girlfriend after we killed one of them, and yet, you let her go to the lion's Den? Nice move brother."

Stefan manages to keep it together and instead of throwing the vase next to him in his brother way, he just closes his eyes and runs his hand over his face.

"We put this plan yesterday; I didn't have much time to tell her about what happened today with Lily, which means that she doesn't even know that they want her."

"Still nice move."

"Do you think I'd let her go there if I knew it was dangerous?" He's walking to him now, arms flying in the air as he loses his patience.

"Even if today didn't happen, why would you let your girlfriend go near them?" Damon asks in cold voice as he stretches his legs on the table ahead of him.

"Do you know Caroline at all? Of course I tried to convince her. And she's not my girlfriend by the way, so it's not like I get to tell her what to do and what not to do." Stefan shouts without breathing.

"Life can be tough." Damon winks at him. "Listen, just relax, you said that the house didn't explode so maybe she didn't go." He shrugs as he takes another sip from his bottle.

"Then why isn't she answering my phone calls?"

Again, Damon just shrugs.

"You know what? I'm gonna go look for her; this isn't working." He says as he takes his jacket and heads to the door.

"But Bonnie is doing the locator spell." Damon argues.

He ignores him and opens the door, only to find Bonnie in front of him.

"Hey." She says.

But he doesn't hear her, all what he senses is Caroline's presence, standing right behind Bonnie with a smile.

He practically shoves Bonnie aside as he walks to Caroline.

"I'm sorry, Matt was hurt and I-" She doesn't get to complete when he hugs her. Hands wrapped around her and almost squeezing her. He buries his head in her hair with closed eyes, taking her scent in.

She is completely startled from his move. She looks at Bonnie and Damon and finds them smiling as they stand next to each other. She tries to ignore their teasing smiles but they're right. Stefan is making a scene, it's completely adorable but still.

Her hands go up and hugs him back. Rubbing slowly against him, assuring him that she's here, with him.

"Stefan." She whispers.

He only sighs.

But then he's kissing her neck. Her mouth opens slightly in surprise. But she doesn't move. Then his mouth is moving to her jaw as he pulls away slowly, not really since his mouth isn't leaving her skin.

Her fingers go deeper into his shirt as he kisses her cheek and stays there for a while before finally pulling away. His face is only inches away from her, eyes staring at her own then going down for her lips.

Her heart skips a beat then, she's surprised from his attitude but she's more surprised that she doesn't want him to stop.

She stares at him and waits.

He leans in, noses already brushing and it's then when she closes her eyes. Her hands still holding his shoulder while his own are still holding her waist. She feels his breath against her skin, and she can already feel his lips close to hers.

But then she feels his lips on her forehead, staying there for too long.

He pulls away then. And after few seconds they open their eyes. Back to the shy smiles and looking away.

"Get a room." Damon says from behind and Bonnie nudges him in the elbow, even thou she is laughing herself.


	22. Time to give in

Today was another day of failure, of plans going south and the tables turning on them. Only this time, it turned on her. So here they are, packing her things and getting ready to leave. Where? They have no idea. But it doesn't matter, because home isn't a place, home is the person you want to be with for every second of your life.

And after what happened to her today, he didn't even think twice. If leaving this town behind would mean that they'll be safe, then be it.

He's carrying the boxes and putting them next to the door when he hears her footsteps.

"Stefan?"

"Yeah?"

He looks up and he can tell that she is nervous for some reason. He waits for her to talk.

"I know that we should be leaving, but I was wondering…" A pause. "I mean, we can leave at morning, right?" She titles her head with a smile.

"I just wanted to spend one more night here, you know?"

He smiles then, looking down and shaking his head.

"Yeah, sure." He says with pressed lips, trying to hold his stupid grin.

"And um," She starts again, hands intertwined together as her heart beats a little faster. "You can stay here... too"

He raises his eyebrows.

"If you want to of course, I mean if you want to go back to Matt's place then you can go you know?" She is rambling now, eyes closed and eyebrows furrowed, trying to cover what seemed to her as a slip.

"Well, I don't know, I mean I didn't tell Matt." He titles his head with a smirk.

"Shut up." She chuckles.

He nods with a smile before licking his lips.

She turns around and walks two steps, leaving him to go back to the boxes.

"Stefan?"

"Yeah?"

He looks up again, and she looks more nervous than before. Her heart is starting to go louder and louder. He frowns.

"You know? In the middle of everything that happened today, being tortured and all." She chuckles nervously at the mention.

"Caroline-" He interrupts only to be interrupted.

"No, just listen." She holds out a hand to stop him "I just- I got to think about… some stuff."

She gulps as she takes a step closer, hand going up and putting her hair behind her ear.

"I mean… you, this… us." She sighs, struggling with the words.

He tilts his head with his eyebrows furrowed, his heart racing just like hers.

"When I'm with you…I'm happy." She chuckles as she steps forward. While he stands still, eyes not even blinking.

"And… I've been trying to find a reason for us to… wait. But… there isn't." She pauses. "You said you'll wait for me to heal, but I realized that... all I need to heal... is you."

Her eyes are shining with hope, her heart pumping like drums. She thinks whether this is enough or she should go further, because this is the best she can do.

"I know this isn't some great speech or anything, but I just- are you gonna say something?" She closes her eyes as she starts to freak out. This isn't easy, and him standing there and staring at her as If she was speaking hieroglyphic makes it even worse.

"I, uh..."

He licks his lips again, taking a breath before taking a step closer.

"I could kiss you." It comes out as a whisper, voice deep and low. It makes her shiver.

"Oh." Is all what she can say, if that counts as a word. She watches him as he gets dangerously closer. It has been months since they were that close, since he looked at her like that and didn't try to hide it or look away.

It's time.

His hand goes up to her hair, burying his fingers in there while his free hand holds her own. The feeling of his fingers intertwined with her own, drawing circles on her skin. The feeling of his fingers playing with her hair, the way his eyes look at her freely, not trying to hold back, the way they hover around her lips.

It all feels good.

But not better than the way his lips feel against hers. It's just like their first time, slow and hesitant. She feels him holding back for a moment, giving her space in case she wanted to pull back. Well, as if.

She realized that she isn't good with words, at least not now. So she convinces him with her lips, pulling him closer. Hand going up to his neck.

This moment, this feeling, it makes her forget about all the time they were apart. Although she is mad at herself for making them wait all this time. But it doesn't matter. Nothing matter right now, except that she's kissing Stefan Salvatore.

And this time, there are no curveballs in their way.


	23. Such a gentleman AU

She checks out her phone for the seventh time in ten minutes. Her other hand is resting next to her empty plate, fingers playing against the table. She leaves the phone and closes her eyes, taking a deep breath she rest back on the chair. _He'll be here_ , she says to herself.

"Would you like me to get you anything?"

She looks up to see the waiter smiling at her politely, too politely actually.

"Ah, some water please."

She smiles nervously. Once he leaves, her eyes fall at the old lady on her right, looking at her with what seems like petty. She looks away to see some couple sitting in front of her and staring at her with also what seems like petty.

She's not surprised. She has been sitting like this for thirty minutes, and in a restaurant like that, it's actually pathetic.

She gulps before looking down and checking her phone again.

 _Damn it_.

While she is freaking out from the inside, she hears the sound of the chair moving. She looks up to see a guy dressed in a suit unbuttoning his jacket as he sits down.

"Sorry I'm late, babe. Traffic is crazy now." He says loudly. She feels the weight of her furrowed eyebrows as she looks around, noticing how people look at her smiling.

She looks back at him with confusion and maybe anger.

"I'm- just go with it okay." He says quietly as he leans forward just a bit. "Whoever didn't bother to show up is a dick."

She suddenly forgets how to speak, and whatever she was going to yell at him with is gone. It is the way he smiles at her. It's not polite or obligated. He doesn't seem like someone who feels bad for her, he looks like he just wants to help, in fact he has an amused look on his face.

"Just go with it, okay?" He asks, perhaps because she is still staring at him with open mouth. As a start she chuckles nervously, putting her hair behind her ear as she looks down. But then she looks up and catches the way he stares at her hair for a second.

It's now his turn to clear his throat . He looks back at her and she opens her mouth, after all she should say something. But nothing comes out, instead she smiles again. And he smiles back, eyes lingering and shining. Yes, he's defiantly enjoying this.

He's about to say something before the waiter comes again. They both look up at the same moment, and this time she doesn't see a polite smile, it's more of a happy smile.

Because the guy showed up.

"Would you like me to bring anything?"

"I don't know, hun? Dinner or some drinks?" He plays along and she is impressed.

She opens her mouth but yet again nothing comes out.

"Dinner." He nods.

He opens the menu and thinks for a moment before giving it to the waiter.

"We would like to have the day's dish, thank you."

The waiter walks away and then he looks back at her, the impressed look on her face amuses him even more.

"Yeah, that was weird." He chuckles as he looks down.

"No, no. I didn't mean that."

Once she talks he looks up and sounds pleased to hear her voice.

"It's just, thank you actually." She swallows nervously with a smile.

He only presses his lips into a smile.

"That's very… kind of you, saving me the petty looks of those people." She rolls her eyes to lighten the words a bit.

"Any time." He says. "But, uh, just to make things clear, I uh… I don't do this often."

She raises her eyebrows.

"You mean rescuing poor girls?"

He chuckles.

"No, I mean, storming into strangers, and just... doing... _this_ " He smiles shyly. "I'm uh, I'm more of a loner actually."

"What?" She gasps dramatically. "I didn't see that coming."

When he looks down to hide his smile, she does see it.

"It's just… I've been sitting there for a while, and I uh, I couldn't look away from you and you just- you looked like- I felt like I knew you for… a long time." He says and she can even see his cheeks blushing slightly.

She doesn't know how to talk for a second.

"You sure you didn't do this before?" She narrows her eyes.

"I swear I didn't." He says quickly, as if defending himself, clearly doesn't know she's just joking. "This is my very first time."

She chuckles.

"Relax, I'm just kidding."

He lets out a breath and his smile goes wider, eyes going back to stare into hers.

"I'm Stefan." He breaks the silence.

"Caroline." She smiles.


	24. Sound and safe

The sound of the door cracking as Stefan opens it makes her glue to him even more. She doesn't like to look scared, but this place is creeping her out. She knew something was off since she saw the old woman at the reception. Looking at them as if they were young souls who will get murdered in one of the rooms at midnight.

Stefan of course, had calmed her down. Although he himself didn't look comfortable with the place.

He walks into the room and she follows him like a shadow, eyes observing the weird decoration as her fingers hold into Stefan's elbow.

When he stops in his place she hits him as she wasn't paying attention.

She looks at him and his eyes wander between her eyes and her hand clutching into his arm.

There's an amused smirk on his lips, and oh it's so beautiful. But she refuses to let him mock her. She pulls her hand and give him a serious look.

"Caroline Forbes can get scared? Who would've known." He teases her.

"Shut up." She rolls her eyes, folding her arms against her chest to sound more… mature.

"This place isn't Disney land after all." She says.

"Hmm, why didn't we go there for Halloween instead of this… horror house?" He holds out one of the old creepy antiques on the table.

"Wait don't don't don't." She panics as she runs to his side. He looks at her with confusion.

Her hands reach to the vase in his hand but she pulls back quickly.

"Put it down, just put it down."

"This?" He asks. "Why?"

"Stefan put it down, this place looks weird already, what if it has some soul in it or a ghost or something?" She rambles.

"It looks pretty." He says with innocent look, throwing the vase casually to his other hand.

"Stefan. Put. It. Down." She says through gritted teeth.

He wipes his smile off and puts on his best serious look as he nods. Once he put it down, she walks around the bed, eyes still examining the place.

"I didn't know you believed in these things." He says.

"Well, we're vampires who live in supernatural world, so." She shrugs. "And it's Halloween."

"Right." He holds his smiles for a longer second.

"So, you wanna take a shower first?" He asks.

"In this bathroom? No thanks." She mumbles.

"I can go with you if you want."

She shoots him a look.

"What? I'll give you my back! I'll even close my eyes." He says with his other best serious slash innocent look.

"I think I'll pass." She replies firmly.

"Oh come on, I thought we were over this just friends period thing." He raises his eyebrows and she gulps.

"What made you think so?"

"I don't know." He says, taking another step closer. "I thought that when you kissed me, that was your way of saying it."

She feels a shiver going through her as his voice switches suddenly, from playful and teasing to whispering and low.

She opens her mouth to come with an excuse but he goes on.

"Or you were actually just taking advantages of me?"

She looks at him with surprise.

"Because I don't know if you got the message, but it's more than okay with me."

Even his smile doesn't make his husky, low voice any better. And the tension around them is the same.

"I'll just sleep." She says after three seconds of mouth open with no words coming out.

He doesn't turn around as she walks pass him, he even takes it as an opportunity to grin widely.

"Fine." He sighs. "I'll take a shower; feel free if you wanna join me." He doesn't turn around as he walks to the bathroom. He can already imagine her cheeks going red.

When he gets out of the shower, she's already under the covers. He manages to hold his laugh at her sight. She is all covered, the blanket stretched from her toes to her noes with her hand holding the edge of it. Her eyes are staring at the ceiling.

She looks at his bare chest once before looking back at the ceiling.

He looks down and smiles before grabbing his shirt and putting it on. His bare feet makes quite a noise in the silent room. He lifts the covers and gets under them, his shoulder brushing against her. Not on purpose of course.

"Ehm ehm." He clears his throat loudly.

"What do you want, Stefan?"

"Nothing." He says.

"I'm bored." He says after five seconds.

"What am I supposed to do about that?"

"I don't know." He sighs.

"Maybe we can do something… other than… sleeping."

She glares at him.

"What?" He asks, offended. "Fine, whatever." He turns to the ceiling before closing his eyes.

Three minutes pass without them moving. Until they hear something cracking.

"Stefan?" She whispers.

"mhm?" He doesn't open his eyes. Until he feels her hand on his bare arm.

"Did you hear that?" She is still whispering.

He doesn't answer for three seconds.

"I didn't want to tell you this, but… I heard people saying that this place is haunted."

"What?"

He feels her grip tighten around his arm.

"Yeah… Something about two old ladies who… died here five years ago."

He feels her other hand on his skin too.

"You sure?"

"Unfortunately." He says. "Seems like we only have each other for tonight."

His other arm sneaks slowly until his hand finds her elbow.

When she doesn't protest, his hand goes to her waist to pull her closer. When she looks up at him he hears some voice in his mind screaming BUSTED.

"Wait… are you- are you trying to scare me?" She says pulling away.

"What? No."

"I can't believe it."

"What? I didn-" He sighs. "Whatever."

"It was worth it thou." He says looking at her with a smile.

She rolls her eyes before turning on her right side to face him. It takes her two minutes to lay her head on his shoulder, and fifty more seconds to lay her hand over his body.

And it takes him two seconds before putting his arm around her.


	25. Not Yours

It's the quiet before the storm. It's the break they take before going back to the battle. He had been through these many times in the past three years, but this time it's different. He's not alone in some warehouse packing his bags. He's in a normal house, in a pink room to be specific.

Normally there are no toys and Barbie posters everywhere. The smell is never this good either. He leans back in his little pink chair, careful not to break it. He looks at the girls in front of him, putting the biscuits in front of Mr. Panda first then giving him his share. He smiles at his plate, reaching his hand to have one.

"No, not like that." One of the girls say with a stern voice that reminds him of someone he used to know.

"You have to take a sip from your tea first then tell us if it needs something, and then you can eat." She says slowly, giving him time to process the instructions.

"Hmm." He raises his eyebrows before doing what she told him to do. "Oh, it's great."

"No, you're not supposed to say that." The other girl says with such exhaustion while the other shakes her head. He starts to think that he's a fool in this conversation.

"You have to taste it then say 'I think it needs more sugar'." She says slowly just like her sister. "And then I will put more sugar in your tea." She beams as she reaches what seems to be her favorite part.

He is about to do just what she told him before he hears someone clearing their throat next to the door. He turns around and the two girls are already hugging her knees.

"Mommy, Stefan is so bad at tea parties." One of them says while looking at him and giggling. They had agreed to call him by his name instead of _Uncle_ Stefan, since he doesn't look _that_ old.

He smiles at her without looking higher, wishing if it was just tea parties that he was bad at.

"Well, it's a good thing that it's bed time." Caroline says and a series of 'no's start.

"Come on, go brush your teeth." She says as she sends them out and they're actually racing to the bathroom. _Of course_ , he thinks.

He stands up, burying his hands in his pockets and licking his lips. He looks around the room once again, trying so hard not to look at her.

It's so difficult. He can swear that her hair is like a magnet to his eyes just begging for them to fall on it.

He gives in, it's stupid and quick it doesn't last more than three seconds, but his heart is already going crazy.

So is hers.

He finally meets her eyes, because it's getting ridiculous and they are not teenagers or some couple from a movie. They can handle eye contact, so he should just grow up and do it. _Do what?_ He thinks. _It's not even a thing._

It's a stake going through his heart ever so slowly, it's a knife cutting through his skin, it's a blood boiling through his veins and it's a sad story flashing in front of his eyes. But it's not a thing.

He presses his lips into a thin line, ignores the noise his heart is making and starts walking to the door.

She steps a side to let him walk out but then she calls him.

He wants to stand in his place and let his mind repeat it over and over again. The way his name falls from her lips, the way every letter feels so special. But he turns around anyway, eyes might be a bit wider than normal.

"I uh," She pauses, her hand putting her hair behind her ear. "Damon, he uh, mentioned something about you-" She pauses to swallow, but she gathers her strength quickly and talks normally.

"He said that you started writing again." She finishes.

His eyebrows get furrowed, because how is this important.

"He basically told me that you're writing about me." She says the sentence in one breath with her eyes closed, when she opens them he's about to defend himself but she goes on.

"I know that it's not my business but I just wanted you to know that I'm happy." Once the words leave her mouth, he can see regret behind her eyes for choosing that word.

"I mean, I have my life now and… I think you knew this would happen."

No, he didn't.

"I just," she lets out a breath before taking a step closer. "I moved on." She nods to herself.

"I think you should too."

He suddenly notices her hand on his, opening his palm slowly. He feels something cold against his skin but all he can do is stare at her. Only when she brings his hand between them that he does look down. Mostly to hide his eyes.

It's the necklace. She still has it after three years, but she's giving it to him now. He clenches his jaw.

"I don't want to be your secret anymore." She says softly. "And I don't want you to be mine, either." She whispers.

He thinks he can see tears in her eyes, but she walks away too soon. It's all too quick, he doesn't even know what just happened. It looks like she let him go for the second time. And he remains still in his place, holding the necklace between his fingers.

It seems that it's the only thing he owns now.


	26. Back to the start

His eyes flutter open to the faint sounds around him, the clock ticking on the wall, the open window going back and forth and the sound of heartbeats going faster and faster. He gets up, swinging his feet to the floor and resting his back to the uncomfortable couch he's been sleeping on for days.

With furrowed eyebrows, he looks at the bed, only to find it empty. His eyes find the bathroom, the door half open and the lights on. He walks to there and pushes the door just a bit.

She looks at him a bit startled, not bothering to take her hand away from her chest. From her place he can tell she was staring at the mirror, and from the sound of her heartbeats he can tell it's been more than few minutes.

Her hair is gathered on one shoulder, the one away from the scar. And her eyes are tired, heavy and red and he can definitely see them shine and it's not just the lights.

"It hurts." She finally speaks after four seconds of just staring blankly at each other. "Is it supposed to hurt?"

He shifts in his place, getting a better hold of the door knob, pursing his lips at the quiver in her voice.

Eyes falling down to the floor- her feet particularly, he mumbles a 'yes, for a while'.

She then nods, mumbles an 'okay' of her own. She licks her lips, looking back to the mirror as her hand continues to stroke the scar.

"I might have an idea, come on." He turns around before she looks at him, walks back to the room and she follows. Her hands are now getting her hair to its normal status. She sits on the couch, eyes following him as he opens the cabinet then walks to her with two beers.

"Seriously?" She titles her head and raises her eyebrows because _this is your idea?_

He only smiles and sits next to her, hands her one bottle after opening it.

"It won't go away, you'll just get used to it." He starts and he can swear he sees fear in her eyes. "Somehow, for some reason, it won't hurt like this. You just have to be patient." He nods at her and she only purses her lips.

"Yeah, well, not all of us are patient." She fakes a smile before taking a sip.

"That's where the beer comes in, it'll just distract you a bit. Would've gone for something stronger but this what we got for now."

"It's settled then, booze is on our list for grocery."

He laughs, it's not really funny, not even a bit but he laughs. Because he just wants to laugh? It's been like this for the past week they spent together; he's been smiling more, talking a lot more, and laughing with a reason or no reason. It's like he just wants to skip to the part where they get back to their old, usual, light dynamic. He wants to skip all the awkwardness and boundaries and rules and skip straight to let-me-ease-your-pain-and-see-your-weakness part because they already got there, four years ago, when they won the world's best friends' medal.

But no, he has to go through all of it all over again because well, he messed up. And to be honest, he doesn't mind. Starting from the bottom, because he enjoyed it the first time; it's like exploring them all over again. But it's the timing that he minds, because right now they don't need to re-explore what they've already settled years ago. Right now, they need to use all this history between them, all those secrets and conversations and insecurities, fears and hopes. This the right time.

Instead they're wasting their time acting like strangers, worse, like a divorced couple- which is a way to describe it but that's not the point.

"You talked to the kids today?" He asks, and curses himself in his mind because he _saw_ her talking to them.

"Yes." She says after taking another sip. "They're fine." She nods to herself.

"They uh, they're really… cute." He smiles before hiding his lips with the bottle.

She nods with a smile, looking away while chewing on her lip.

Awkward silence, _check_.

She suddenly groans, head titled and jaw clinched. Her hands go up to her chest in a subtle move. She doesn't even look at him.

"It's like toothache." He says and she looks at him. "Comes and goes. And when it fades you uh…" He pauses, looking down at the beer in his hands. "You almost forget that it ever hurt, but then it comes back. It hits you and… it sucks." He looks at her then.

She is silent. She is always silent lately.

"Well, It's a good thing you had Valerie." She smiles.

He scoffs, looking down and shaking his head. "It's not… it wasn't…" He just shakes his head.

He can see her getting angry, hears her heartbeats getting louder again.

"Caroline, listen-"

"It's not working." She stands up, putting the beer down on the table. "I think I'll just sleep it off, sleeping always works." She mumbles as she already walks to the bed.

He takes a deep breath and doesn't move.

"See ya tomorrow." She says before burying herself under the covers and giving him her back.

He nods to himself.

It seems like whether he likes it or not, he has to start from the bottom.

All over again.


	27. Chapter 27

_Prompt: "Breathe, okay? Just breathe."_

…

…

"So remind me again why I'm here?" He asks, faking annoyance but it's written on his face that he's _oh_ so enjoying this.

"Because I have few papers to hand." She answers with a smile. "Which I've already told you." She titles her head as they turn around another building. He should pay more attention to the place around him, it's his first time in a campus, probably not but for him it is.

"So you have papers to hand, why am I here?" He goes on.

"Because you are my responsibility." She says proudly.

"Huh, so I'm uh, like a case thing?" He raises his eyebrows and watches as she shakes her head with a laugh.

"That's not true! Even before the whole amnesia thing, I was always your sober sponsor." She beams.

"Isn't it supposed to be the other way? Since, you know, I'm older." He smirks.

"You might be older, but I've been always better than you at controlling blood lust, which you taught me in the first place."

"So, I taught you how to control your blood lust even though I couldn't control it myself?" He seems confused as he speaks those words.

"You were a great person." She shakes her head, looking down as they walk. And then she snaps and looks at him with wide eyes. "Are, you _are_ a great person. That's what I meant."

He laughs, and she chuckles nervously.

"No, seriously, how did I do it? How could I teach you something I couldn't do?" He stands in his place, causing her to stop walking as well.

"I don't know." She shrugs, adjusting her bag on her shoulder. "I guess you taught me what you wanted to do, but couldn't do. And you were good at controlling it, you know? You managed to stay on animal diet which is hard to any vampire, so imagine someone with such issues."

He nods, satisfied with her answer but willing to hear more about him from her.

"You, uh, you controlled it very well, but it was always in you… the hunger." She smiles. "And so, every now and then, it took over you. But you always fought back."

"That must be tiring."

"It sure is, but you never got tired, even more, you helped a new vampire to control her hunger. I mean you could've just blown me away, we weren't that close back then and I definitely wasn't your responsibility. Yet, you helped me."

He looks at her eyes, the way she looks at him. He believes that she's thinking about _him_ , and he loves the way her eyes look when she does.

"You really helped me, Stefan." She says, more serious than before. "You know? Sometimes I smell blood, when someone is cut, or when there're heartbeats around me and I haven't fed in a while, and I almost lose control. But then I remember this one time, back when you were teaching me."

She takes a step closer and takes his hand. And at first he's taken back but he manages to hide it. Besides, she's already busy staring down at their hands, apparently stuck in some memory.

"I couldn't handle the hunger, I was panicking and then.. you held my hand, and you told me to breathe. You looked at me and you forced me to breathe. _Breath, okay? Just breathe._ "

She pauses for a moment, smiling down at their hands.

"And it always works, just like that, I control it." She looks at him then, smiling tenderly. "You _are_ my responsibility, Stefan. We are each other's responsibilities. You pulled me back all that time ago, and I'll do the same for you. Always."

When she pulls back and starts walking, he follows her. But there's only one thing in his mind. _What kind of an idiot was I to be just friends with her?_


	28. Don't look

_Prompt: 6."DON'T LOOK"_

...

…

He's almost running, feet trying to take him anywhere far away from here. Away from all these faces and their heartbeats and their delicious necks. So he pushes the door open and walk down the stairs, and if he was in a better state he would have time to be grateful for the alley being empty. But right now, all he can think about is blood, the need to sink his teeth into someone's neck and get high on warm, delicious blood right from the vain.

He closes his eyes, hand grabbing the fence next to him as he tries to breath. _In and out_ , once and twice till he is no longer seeing images of blood in his head.

He hears the door opening again, and then there's the soft sound of heels walking to him and then there's the lovely, soothing ' _Stefan_?' that leaves her mouth.

He has always appreciated the way she stayed with him, always there to pull him back whenever he went too deep. But this time, he wants nothing but for her to turn around and walk away. He doesn't want her to see him like this. Regardless to the fact she's seen him like this many times before, but now he doesn't want her to.

And he won't even bother to ask himself why. It's normal to feel ashamed of what he is, of the way his veins appear under his eyes, the way his fangs force him to part his lips, the way his eyes turn into something that if he got the chance to look in the mirror, he wouldn't recognize. But she has the time to look at him, to see the monster that he is, and to not recognize him, And maybe she'll be disgusted as well.

She is a vampire herself, yes, but she's nothing like him. She is beautiful, and he is ugly. Her look can sooth him, and his look can scare the hell out of her.

"Stefan." She says again, breaking through his thoughts. He notices that her voice is closer than before. And he understands the reason behind it when her hand touches his shoulder, firm yet gentle, trying to make him turn around.

So he does the exact opposite, looks the other way and tries to calm his features but it's not working.

"Hey, Stefan? It's okay." She says. And instead of replying he lets out a breath, and it sends him crazy, because it sounds like a growl coming out of an animal.

"Just… Leave." He says through his teeth, trying to think of something else but her pulse is louder than it's supposed to be. Is she scared? Or it's just his senses being heightened?

"I'm not gonna leave you." She says, confused by the fact that he even thought she would walk away and leave him like this. "Just…" She pauses, trying again to make him turn around but he is too stubborn, still trying to calm his face.

"Caroline." He growls.

"Stefan Salvatore, I am your sober sponsor, get over yourself." She then spins around him and comes face to face with him. And he doesn't think of blood, he is no longer hungry. He is mad. And he wants to push her away but he stops himself, only turns around again, angrier.

"DON'T LOOK." He shouts, his veins appearing more and more, being clearer than before, his fangs no longer under control.

"Stefan, hey, it's me."

He closes his eyes, feels her hand as she goes up and down over his arm.

"I'm not scared of you. I look in the mirror and I see them, too." She says, and then she's silent. Only her hands are still moving, and he calms down a bit.

"I let you see them before, in that bathroom, remember?"

And here it is, another image to take over his head. Of a blonde crying and shaking, and his two arms holding her. Somehow they end up standing in front of each other, his two hands on both of her shoulders while her hands are around his neck.

And he suddenly notices how tall he is and how short she is and that her shoulders are too comfortable and her hands are too warm. He breathes in and out, and realizes she's doing the same thing.

He knows that he's himself again, yet he doesn't open his eyes. It feels like heaven, and opening his eyes right now would be the dumbest thing to do.

And she doesn't even wait for him to open them instead she pulls him down for a hug, trying to hide him in her embrace, which is almost hilarious, if it wasn't for the situation they are in.

Her hands go up and down his back, and she whispers lots of it's okay and I got you. But most of all, her pulse doesn't send him crazy, in fact, it makes him calmer than before.


	29. Chapter 29

Prompt: _"But I don't want to leave."_

…

…

She closes the door gently, tying not to wake her mother who just fell asleep. He smiles. She smiles. And he follows her down the stairs.

"I still think we should've stayed at the hospital."

"The doctors said she could leave so don't worry about it." He says with a smile she doesn't see.

"Well, they might be wrong. And it's not like they know a lot lately." She huffs without looking at him, taking the few glasses on the table and walking to the kitchen.

And he follows.

"Caroline, Kai took all the blood effect from her system." He says quietly, watches as her moves slow down. "She's fine."

"Yeah." She mumbles. "My blood is out of her system, no vampire blood to speed up her illness." She turns around then, her body resting against the sink. "But she's still sick, still _dying_."

It's like a stake being pushed into his flesh, looking at her in this state. The way her lips tremble and her eyes water. The way she looks away from him.

"Hey." He whispers, moving one step from the door before stopping in his place. He doesn't know what to do. More like, he can't hold her anymore because he can't see her break anymore. He's seen lots of that lately and he doesn't like the sight of Caroline Forbes falling apart.

She chuckles, it's forced and has no sense of relief in it, just an attempt to lighten up the situation.

"It's okay." She looks at him. "I'm not going to break down in the kitchen." She chuckles again, and he doesn't like it. "You can leave. Go, have some rest. That's enough for one day."

She offers him a smile, it's real and warm and he really wishes if it was under other circumstances so he could've actually enjoyed it. So he stares, not sure what to do or what to say. He just knows that he doesn't want to see her in pain, that this person, Caroline, _his_ Caroline, deserves a lot better than this.

"But I don't want to leave."

He doesn't know how he said it, where did the courage come from and how did he actually put the words together since he seemed to be shocked just like her.

She lets out a breath, almost a laugh. Her face lightening up a bit, her features relaxing and her lips curving into a smile. Then they tremble again, and her arms which were crossed against her chest are falling to her sides as she lets out another breath. different from the first, more broken and shaky.

They both walk to each other at the exact point, moving in sync till their bodies meet. Her head hits his chest, hands clinging to his back as he wraps her in his arms, one hand holding her head and the other moving against her back. He hushes her even though she's barely making any sound, but she's shaking and her fingers almost hurt him from the pressure.

"It's okay, everything will be okay." He lies, because it will only get worse and worse. He just has to be here.


	30. Shelter

_**Prompt:**_ _6x15 - "Caroline? Sorry to barge in, door was unlocked." and she is there!_

…

…

He walks in, looking around and the place seems empty. But then he looks to his right and finds her sitting on the couch, and Elena is standing and looking at him. He looks at Elena with a questioning look, then back to Caroline.

Her hands are collided together in her lap, fingers stroking her own skin. She doesn't look up, her gaze remains directed on her hands. So he looks back to Elena, and her face worries him even more. And so he titles his head with furrowed eyebrows.

"I uh, I'll just go." Elena says, and as she walks to leave her eyes remain on Stefan. She even stops in front of him, her eyes trying to tell him something, her lips are a thin line. And she nods to him and maybe he understands that whatever needs to be done, he can do it.

He stands in his place, waits till she closes the door behind her. His hands don't leave his pockets as he looks at her, insure of what to do. He looks down before walking around the chair, then sitting on it, his knees almost touching her own.

"Hey." He says and his voice is awkwardly low.

She doesn't answer, nor even look up, but he sees her swallow and her jaw appears as she clinches it.

His hand goes up to her shoulder, brushing her hair away then resting on there. And then she looks away, taking a breath. And he hates how it looks like his touch annoys her.

"You okay?" He says it, and he doesn't mean it as a bad thing. But he doesn't know that it takes her to hours earlier when he said the same words, only to walk away.

She nods absently, then looks around her.

"Can you leave?" She doesn't even look at him.

"What?"

"I just wanna be alone for tonight." She stands up and starts walking to the stairs but he stands, too. His eyebrows are still furrowed, confused with her words.

"No, you don't." He says confidently. She stops in her place, her back facing him. "Not tonight, not ever… But specially not tonight."

She stays quiet for a long moment, closing her eyes as she speaks. "Stefan, leave." She starts walking again.

"Listen, what I said today, it was wrong." He shakes his head, wishing if he can see her face. So he walks to her, taking big steps and standing right behind her even though she shifts in her place.

"I uh, I left you when you needed me most." He nods to himself.

"It's okay, I don't need you now." She whispers.

He holds her hand in instant, now able to see the side of her face.

"But I need you, always have and always will." He says. "And… I want to be here for you." He swallows, tries to catch any kind of reaction. He wants to know that he's not too late.

"I almost turned it off." She says and he freezes, his mouth hanging open as he blinks, all the while his hand tightening around her hand more. "I still want to." Her voice is louder, steadier and stronger.

"Caroline-"

"It's okay."

"No, listen… I- I was scared, I started to think that maybe… Maybe it's better if we stay like we are, because we were always there for each other, and I wanted to be there for you and-" He lets out a short breath. "And I just didn't know how to be there for you." He shakes his head, moves around her so he's facing her. He holds her other hand as well, and looks down to meet her gaze.

And she does look at him, and he sees _her_ , his Caroline, with all her cracks and insecurities and fears. He opens his mouth, then closes it. He knows he has to say something, but he doesn't know what to say. Because in his mind there are thousands of lines he came up with while walking to her house. And in his mind he is so sure of what he feels. He just doesn't know what to say.

"I like you, Caroline." He smiles, his fingers moving against her hands. "I don't know when it became more than friendship… but it did and- and it scared me." He lets out a breath, and one hand comes to her cheek.

Her eyes are wider than usual, filled with water and uncertainty.

"I'm sorry if I made you question that, but I'm not leaving again. I'm here, I will always be here." He nods.

Her hand leaves his grip to hold his other hand on her cheek, her lips tremble and she suddenly feels tired. So her head falls to his shoulder, her other hand hugs him and he's already wrapping her in his arms.

And the thing is, she doesn't know if he's right. She doesn't know if he means it, and she definitely still has thousands of question marks in her head. But all day, she's been faking strength and it hurts. And he's here, and his shoulder is so tempting to cry on, to fall apart and break.

So as she cries and sobs against his shoulder, as she lets him comfort her, she doesn't care which category he belongs in. He's Stefan Salvatore, her best friend, the one she's in love with and the only person in the world who can hold her in his arms and take away her pain.

So she cries, and lets him comfort her.

…


	31. Chapter 31

_**Prompt:**_ _"And then you laughed" and/or "Tell me a secret"_

…

…

They're lying on his bed, his back is against the bed and she's resting on his chest. There's a smell of summer and shampoo and wet hair and new starts and being safe. They stay quiet for a long while, just breathing. His hand is stroking her hair, while her hand is holding his other hand and playing with his ring.

He lets out a long breath before kissing the top of her head and staying there. She then looks at him, curious, but she just smiles and buries her head back in his chest, nuzzling her nose against his shirt.

"I'm bored." She mumbles.

"Wanna go back to searching for two vampires who lost their sanity and went around murdering people?" He whispers against her hair, his lips curving into a smile, specially when she slaps his chest.

"This isn't actually the kind of fun I'm looking for." She says.

"Oh, well, what do you have in mind?" He smirks, even though she's not looking.

"Tell me a secret."

Of all the possible ideas that he expected, he didn't see this one coming. So he stays quiet, wonders if she's serious or he can just skip it.

"Caroline, I'm sure you know everything about me by now." He smiles.

"That's not what I mean, I mean, tell me something special, something no one knows about but you." Her voice isn't funny or excited, she's serious. And as her fingers play around his shirt, he can't think of anything but her.

"Tell me a secret." She says again.

He sighs, his mind going through everything he has done through his life, thinking about something worth sharing. He thinks about the ripper, and the guilt, he could tell her about that. But she knows enough about it. And suddenly he finds everything that he comes up with either not worth sharing or something she already know.

"I uh, I had a crush on you," He pauses, watches her fingers as they still on his chest. "Back when I lost my memories." He licks his lips and waits for her respond, but it's too long before she speaks.

"Go on." She says. And he chuckles.

"I saw pictures, you know, and you were just hard to not notice. Damon said you were my best friend, and I uh…" He sighs. "I thought he was lying, partly because I didn't really trust him, but also because I… liked to think there was more of it." He shakes his head and he doesn't see the way she smiles.

"And then I met you, and it didn't seem like we were having some secret affair so…"

She laughs then and he goes on.

"I didn't have any memories, what did you expect?" But then he laughs with her. "And you dragged me to this party and we danced and things were kinda under control. Tyler was there, So I started to think that maybe it was all in my head… And then you laughed… And I couldn't care less about Tyler."

She laughs again.

"And then I had my memories back and…"

"It was weird." She completes for him.

"Yeah." He says. "It's just, I didn't know where it came from. Everything was a full picture, the way everyone acted around me, the way Damon and Elena left things out of their stories, the way you were there for me."

He holds her hand then, runs his fingers against her palm.

"The way I saw you, it was different, and I knew it meant something, but… I didn't want to go there." He hears letting out a breath. "I was scared." He admits with closed eyes.

He opens his eyes when she moves, only to close them again when she kisses them. She takes her time with it, doesn't pull away for a while. "I didn't know I was that scary." She teases.

"Oh, you still are."

They both laugh, actual giggles fill the room and he feels good, he feels something he didn't feel in a long time. Maybe relief, because in this moment, he has nothing to worry about, nothing to even think about. He just lays there with her for two more hours, and he wants nothing more.

…


	32. Scar

Prompt: _37\. You still remember ?_

…

…

He doesn't know how long he's been staring at his drink. But it can't be too long; after all she's still here, sitting right in front of him. And if he remained silent for an awkward long moment she would definitely make a comment. Because there is a conversation going, and if his memory didn't betray him it was his turn to talk.

"You still remember?" Just because he speaks doesn't mean he looks away from his drink. He can't. Feeling her eyes on him, reading him, burning holes into his skin. His pulse rises just a bit and he holds his breath.

But, he is good at keeping the smile casual.

Scratch that, even his smile is forced and it literally hurts keeping it there.

"Well, not every day you get a straight rejection thrown at you." She shrugs. "Even in my life, which I know is a surprise, but this didn't happen a lot. Well, it was just you." She narrows her eyes, takes a moment to remember. "Yup, just you." She beams at him, even though he is not looking at her, still studying the non-existent curves in his glass.

"Not to mention that you said it in this… _way_. I don't know but it really got stuck in my mind." She leans forward eagerly, her hands crossing half the table they are sitting on. Ah, the grill, such a great place to have this conversation.

And he can't help it but look up, because he doesn't understand her cheery voice and excited poster. So maybe having a look at her face will make things more buy-able.

Nope. Definitely not; she is smiling, even close to laughing. Is she really enjoying this?

"Caroline… you and me, it's not gonna happen. Sorry." She mimics him; her voice isn't close to his, at all. But she is good with the furrowed eyebrows and he gets that when she deepens her voice way down, she is just trying to portray his seriousness.

He might sound shocked but she carries on, not really noticing.

"I mean, _wow_ , way to make things clear, Stefan." She falls back in her chair, laughing. And he feels different emotions all at once. Surprise, guilt, disgust and maybe disappointment. It sure is disappointment.

Maybe he expected her to be more affected by it. Maybe a part of him was disappointed that it meant nothing to her. Well, double the disgust, because he is oh so sad she didn't stroke his ego and actually cared about it.

He tries to bury them all down, and forces his lips to widen the smile; she is laughing. It's clearly funny, almost a joke. He just didn't get the joke.

And she finally catches his stiffness, one hand tightened around the glass. His lips curved into thin line that should be a smile?

And so she stops laughing, but smiles before her face goes completely blank.

"Oh, Stefan…" She closes her eyes, shaking her head. "It's really fine."

He swallows and stars nodding.

"You know, it was long time ago." She titles her head.

He looks back at his drink, still nodding and smiles.

"Besides, it was actually a good thing. If you went down that road, you wouldn't be sitting here." She leans forward and says in a low voice. "I mean did you see the list of my exes? They're hardly in my life anymore." She scoffs, leaning back in her place.

"It's a good thing you didn't make it to the list." She raises her glass in a toast that he doesn't like.

But he smiles again, raises his glass and takes a long, slow sip. No matter what she says, or does. No matter how many smiles she puts, or laughs she lets. He still feels guilty.

And there is still that voice in his head that says it is all an act. That it did hurt, and it still does.

But there will always be another voice, asking whether he believes so, or wishes so.


End file.
